Never Say Never
by ForEverTopaz1901
Summary: Edward has returned to Forks. A series of newspaper headlines catch him off guard. What has happened to Bella and Charlie? Rated M for alcohol, drugs, language, and sexual themes.
1. Preface

**A/N: I've been planning this story for quite a while now, and I want to go ahead and get started on it while these ideas are fresh in my mind. Of course I'm sure everyone has written or planned on writing a story like this . . . but I still wanted to try this out myself. Normally, I'm the one for humorous stories - prank wars, Edward/Bella embarrassment, etc. - and if that's the kind of genre that you are looking for, then this fanfic isn't for you. This is a perfectly serious story and there won't be much humor in it . . . so I am warning you all now. I rated this story M just in case some of the younger readers find some events offensive or too innappropriate, but I really wanted to try this out. I hope that most of you enjoy reading this! I would love to hear input if it ever needs improvement!**

_Preface:_

_I had faced death so many times in my life; I was hardly even scared of it anymore. I knew that the end had to come at some point, but I had never imagined it being as painful and as unexpected as this. I am the barely living proof that life really does flash before your eyes when you are directly facing death. I've seen everything I've gone through in the past few years in just a few seconds. All the way down to meeting my true love to him leaving me here to fend for myself. Of course I did have the honor of seeing him one last time before coming to my dreadful end. It was not the meeting that I would have imagined for my newly returned true love . . . but at this point, I am grateful that I saw him at all. My chest tightened as the lacerations on my arms, neck, and torso began to burn and throb more than ever. I was sure the pain would have driven me mad before my life was over. I tried to tell myself that there could have been a worse way to die, but I knew very well that it wasn't true. I tried not to pay attention to the fact that some of these wounds were definitely my fault . . . but some were caused by others; I'm almost positive that anger was part of the reason I was still alive . . . barely. My vision kept fading in and out of focus; I felt like I was getting ready to faint from the stench of my blood. Instead of giving in, I thought of him, wishing more than anything that I could see him again. _

_As my life began to fade away, I began to go completely numb. I felt like someone else was here . . . maybe more than a simple someone else. I was too tired to notice much more than feeling a simple presense next to me on the grass. Another hallucination, I guessed._

_But it doesn't matter now._


	2. News Flash

**A/N: Yeah, I know the preface was just a wee bit vague. But it will all get clearer as the story progresses I promise! This chapter probably won't make any sense either to be honest...but I hope you like it!**

**Edward:**

It had been so long since I had turned onto this particular road, passed these all too familiar houses. It was twilight, but I was neither happy nor sad. I was, more than anything, reluctant - and that was a pure understatement. I wondered if this was even really the right thing to do. How hard would it be for me to just show up on Bella's doorstep, only hoping for forgiveness if she was willing? I had thought of her reaction. She would most likely turn me away . . . and I wasn't entirely sure how that would effect me. I knew that this possiblility was very high above the others, which caused the reluctance.

Then again, if she was willing to accept an apology and a plea for forgiveness, would I feel relief or would I feel guilt? I'm sure it would be a mixture of both if this miracle occured and Bella did forgive me. But which emotion would be more potent? Would I hate myself for ruining her life once again? Or would I feel whole again?

I had pulled onto the curb near Bella's house. There was a police car in the driveway, but I had expected just as much. What I hadn't been expecting was the absence of a certain red and rusty vehicle.

I gripped my steering wheel harder than necessary, very confused. Bella had never been one for going out after dark . . . except when she was with me. She was nearly always home, cooking dinner for Chief Swan or reading her favorite book, Wuthering Heights. But, obviously, she wasn't here.

Maybe she had found someone else.

Maybe this wasn't the best idea.

I snorted. "Of course it's not a good idea, " I said to myself. I knew that as soon as I had made up my mind. Leaving the way I did was very uncivil and horrible . . . I wasn't going to keep on until Bella knew the reasons behind my selfish behavior.

Despite my doubt, I turned the engine of my Volvo off and climbed out, shutting the car door quietly. The look of the house was just as I had left it, but still, something didn't seem right at all. I walked towards Bella's window anyway. Maybe I will just wait in her room for her until her return. The window was already wide open - no noise would be made.

I leapt up the house's siding and pulled up onto the window sill. This room couldn't have been Bella's. It didn't have any of her belongings scattered along the floor or on her work desk. There was no bed - only a black couch with a flat screen TV hung up on the wall. A cooler of beverages had been left open against the west wall where her stack of books had last been. Her out-dated computer was replaced with a laptop that wasn't at all cheap. But, the main thing that was missing, was her scent.

Standing there in the middle of this stranger's room confused me even more. No truck, no scent, and most importantly, no Bella.

The clatter of pots and pans broke me from my strange, momentary trance. I hopped out of the room through the window, landing on the grass without a sound. I began to walk back towards my car, racking my brain for a reason of her absence. Had she taken her mother's advice to move away to Florida? My hand had frozen on the handle of the car door. That possibility was most likely true . . . and I couldn't go anywhere sunny. I groaned internally.

"Can I help you, son?" It was a man's voice, but it had definitely not come from Charlie.

I turned around to see who was speaking to me. It was a man dressed in a deep blue police uniform. He was standing in front of Bella's front door, a cigarette in his hand. "No, I'm sorry. I must have gone to the wrong house," I lied. I knew that this was - or used to be - Bella's house. I couldn't mistake it for someone else's. I turned back towards my car, preparing to leave. I guess my next stop was Jacksonville.

"Well maybe I can help you find who you are looking for," he offered, stopping me again.

I sighed, wondering if it was a good idea to even inquire about Bella and Charlie. It wouldn't hurt me if I did ask . . . and I was truly curious as to what was going on. "I was looking for Isabella Swan."

The man's face grew grim. "You're a Cullen, aren't you?" I nodded, unable to say anything. The word of my family's sudden disappearance had unfortunately spread around. He seemed to know that I had absolutely no clue what had happened. "Maybe you should come inside for a bit. There's a lot to explain."

My throat tightened as I begin to grow worried. Something had happened here . . . something dreadful and tragic judging my this strange man's grim expression. I tried to read this man's mind, but he hadn't been thinking anything of importance that would help me in any way. I didn't know what else to do, just turning around and driving off knowing that some help was staring me right in the face would definitely cause regret in the long run. I had enough emotions inside of me and I didn't need to add on to it.

As he let me inside, he offered me a plate of food, which I blankly turned down. He told me to sit down in the living room while he went to get some things. I immediately obeyed and sat down on the brown leather couch. I heard the man moving around upstairs, and when he returned, I noticed newspaper articles in his hands.

"So, you're Edward Cullen, huh?" he asked, walking towards me.

"Yes, sir."

"I'm Chief Waltren, but you can call me Mark." I didn't say anything to that. I didn't really know what I could say; I only wanted to know what had happened and then get out of here. Mark sighed and cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I don't really need to do any of the talking," he said as he held up the newspaper articles. "These pretty much explain everything."

He handed them over to me. The headings seemed to stick out at me, more than anything. I hadn't even noticed that I was no longer breathing.

**POLICE CHIEF CHARLIE SWAN MURDERED**

My air supply was still cut off. I couldn't believe it. I flipped through to the next article.

**GANG ACTIVITY RESPONSIBLE FOR LOCAL POLICE CHIEF'S MURDER  
NATHAN FORRESTER RESPONSIBLE**

And then, the next one.

**FLORIDA AIRLINE PLANE CRASH  
49 FOUND DEAD**

I skimmed through the names of those who had died. Two names were familiar: Renee and Phil Dwyer. I moved that one to the side, and glanced at the worst headline yet.

**ISABELLA SWAN MISSING  
POLICE HAVE NO LEADS**

**A/N: Review and tell me what you think!**


	3. Action

**A/N: Here's the next chapter! This might explain some things :) Now, this story is rated M for MATURE! There are going to be alcohol, drugs, and sexual themes in this chapter. So DO NOT READ IF YOU DON'T APPROVE! **

**Bella:**

**_Four Months Earlier_**

"Jesus Christ, Alex. Could you please keep your hands off of me for more than five seconds?" I said as I shoved him away. He frowned, his frame slightly swaying from side to side. He plopped down on one of the nearby bar stools and gave me puppy-dog eyes. I rolled my eyes as I lit up another cigarette. "Grow up."

Alex was my soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend if he kept this annoying child-like behavior up. He had untame, long blonde hair. It had grown all the way to his shoulders to my extreme dismay. His beard had grown to an uncomfortable length for any sort of kissing. I swore to him that I wasn't going to even touch his face until he had shaved that monster off. His lips were very plump, which made him an exceptionally good kisser. I didn't enjoy it when he was extremely turned on though . . . it felt as if his large lips were sucking my features clean off my face.

I suppressed a shudder just thinking about it and blew the Malboro cigarette smoke out into the air.

A month had passed since everything had happened. The definition of everything? My entire family being wiped off of the face of the earth. I tried hard not to think about it all. My own father was mercilessly murdered by a gang member who wanted revenge for locking his brother in the slammer. And then, not long after that, my mother and stepfather were killed in a freak plane accident on their way to rescue me from the always rainy town of Forks, Washington. I was depressed enough after the death of Charlie . . . the weather was definitely not helping me improve.

Out of habit, I glanced at the scars on my wrists. There were five on each arm, etched into my skin in random places. Some still hadn't healed; the pink tint to the newest ones were just now beginning to fade.

I had stopped wearing long sleeves. Now, I wore black tank tops or leather sleeveless jackets that matched my new motorcycle. I didn't care about hiding the cuts on my arms anymore. To be honest, I really didn't care about what people thought about them. I didn't care about anything.

I was tired of being the good girl. I wanted to break _his_ promise. Did he honestly think that I could keep up with not doing anything stupid or reckless? Now, doing stupid and reckless things were all I wanted to do. Hell, I was being stupid just standing here. I was an illegal intruder inside of One-Eyed Pete's bar in Port Angeles. I fit in with the people here due to my new style of clothing. After my 19th birthday, I bought a fake ID from Alex. The recklessness all seemed to work out from then on.

"Come on, baby," Alex said as he traced his finger up and down my right arm. "How about we ditch and go to my place?"

I shrugged. "Whatever," I said, annoyed. I hated it when he was drunk. He only thought about one thing . . . and I was never really in the mood for intimate actions.

"You really turn me on when you're angry," he whispered against my neck. He began to kiss the small space under my ear and chill bumps rose on my arms. I couldn't be mad at him when he did that. I playfully pushed his face away and he slid his arms around my waist, chuckling under his breath. "My house it is." I could hear the smile in his voice.

Normally, I didn't like to cross Jennifer and Bill, my new guardians. Or foster parents . . . whatever the hell you wanted to call them. I had been dropped off at their house by the new Chief of Police, and Charlie's old friend, Mark Waltren. Jenn enjoyed using me as a punching bag, and Bill was always wasted enough that he just didn't care. Sometimes he would deliver a few good kicks and/or punches along with Jenn. I didn't respect either one of them . . . so why the hell would I follow their rules? They always wanted me home before 11:00 so they could continue to ruin my life. But it was almost 1 in the morning. There was no point in going back now.

I stuck my half-smoked cigarette into a nearby ashtray and let Alex lead me towards the door of the bar. I called a quick goodbye over my shoulder to all of my friends before exiting. We walked over to his white truck and he opened the door for me with a mischeivous smile. I stared at him, confused.

Instead of climbing into the driver's side, he crawled right on top of me, grabbing the handle of the door and slamming it shut. He lowered his face down and I pushed it away, jabbing a forefinger in his direction. "I'm not doing anything with you until you shave, Al," I warned.

"Fine," he said. "I go crazy when you call me Al. And it's been so long since you've given me some action. I'll get right to it when I get home."

"It's been two days," I laughed, playing absent-mindedly with a lock of his shaggy hair. "But if you get rid of your beard, I will think about giving you your dose of action." His bright green eyes seemed to light up as soon as the words were out of my mouth.

I had never seen him jump out of the car that fast, expecially while drunk. I will admit that I may have had a bit too many drinks tonight . . . but I had only been completely wasted once. And that led to my extremely painful first time in Alex's apartment.

Now, after three weeks of dating him, we did everything together. I didn't always approve of his behavior while drunk, but he always sobered up and became my best friend again. He was the one who introduced me to drugs, cigarettes, and, of course, sex. Our love life wasn't all that bad to be honest. I was nearly always in a bad mood, but that was the usual. He was the only one to find my annoyed attitude attractive. Alex and I only fought when he would try and seduce me when I really wasn't in the mood. He had seemed to get the point lately.

Alex had jumped into the driver's side and took off at full speed, running through two red lights. If his apartment hadn't been so close, I would have taken the wheel. But not much could happen in a rushed five-minute drive. I protested when he carried me inside of his base floor apartment instead of letting me walk myself. He plopped me down on his couch and leaned in to kiss me. I didn't say anything this time. I felt bad about driving this poor boy crazy without any 'action'.

He slid his arms down the sides of my torso, grabbing hold of the bottom of my tank top. I grabbed his hands, stopping him. I smiled against his lips. "Not until you shave, Al."

"Yeah, Al. Listen to your lady. That beard of yours is obviously becoming a problem." Alex's brother, Nick, walked into the room, holding a bottle of Budweiser.

I laughed. "Hi, Nick."

"Hey, Bella. You're looking pretty good today," he said when Alex stood up.

"Shut up, Nick. She's mine," Alex snapped at his brother.

"What would you say about a threesome, Bell? I just washed my new silk sheets . . ." He was cut off when Alex shoved him.

Nick always said things like this when he was trying to annoy the hell out of Alex. It always worked. I always found their sibling rivalry quite funny; Nick was just as much my big brother as he was Alex's. "Go shave, Al," I said, pointing towards the bathroom.

"Fine. Meet me in the bedroom, Bell," he said, smiling his large, goofy smile. I nodded before he disappeared around the hallway. I got up and went into Alex's bedroom, sitting down on his black sheets.

Nick appeared in the doorway. "I was serious, Bell," he said with a smile. "What would you say to a threesome?"

"I would say no thank you, Nick." Annoyed, I rolled my eyes. "You know, one joke a day is enough. I don't need you trying to seduce me at the same time as your brother."

He held his hands up defensively. "Girl, I was just kidding. But if you ever want to try things with someone else . . ."

"Go away, Nick," I laughed, the same goofy smile Alex had spreading across his face.

I piled the Alex's black pillows up on top of each other and plopped down on them, spreading my arms out as I waited for him to come back. I hated free time. I always had to be doing something. If I wasn't doing anything during free time, I was wallowing depressively in it. Whenever I had to be home by 11:00, Alex would always sneak in through my window and entertain me. I was literally always doing something.

Alex appeared in the doorway. "How do I look?" he asked, stroking his clean face.

I smiled, happy that I could finally see _all_ of his face. "Good job, Al." He shut the door behind him and walked with exaggerated slowness towards me. I laughed. "You are such a dork."

Once he reached the side of the bed, he laid down on top of me and began kissing me. His clean face was so much better; I stroked his soft cheek, glad to be able to feel it again without the thick facial hair in the way. "You know," Alex said between kisses. "I think tonight is going to go _extremely_ well."

"Yeah?"

"Absolutely," he said, sliding his hands down my body as he had done earlier on the couch. His hands were shaking as he was trying to calm himself down.

"Even better than two days ago?"

"That night was amazing as well, I have to admit." He kissed me again, still trying to remain in control of himself, to go slow. He knew I didn't like it when he was rough or moving too fast, tearing clothes off of me and throwing them across the room to get what he wanted even faster. I liked everything to be long and extended. It took up more time. "But I'm feeling extra lucky." He had reached my thighs and hitched them around his waist. As his hands slid back up to my shirt, he pulled it above my head, not interrupting the kiss for long. I grabbed fistfuls of his hair as his hands reached my waist. He was going to get his action.

**A/N: Yeah, I know. Not at all like the normal Bella. Not at all like the normal me writing about a naughty Bella either! But I wanted this story to be different . . . so review and tell me what you thought please!**


	4. Euphoria

**A/N: Judging by most of the reviews I have recieved . . . you all like my dark side! Yay! Thank you!! Anyways, here's the next chappie. WARNING: Just like the last one . . . but possibly worse, it could get a little steamy.**

**Bella:**

I rolled over on my side, pulling the sheets all the way up to my chin. Alex had fallen asleep after our latest fling, which, I had to admit, was probably one of our better times. He had been right; tonight was one of our best work together.

I had never even regretted not using protection. I honestly didn't really care that things could happen to me . . . it wouldn't matter to me if they did. I was purposely being stupid and reckless, and I needed someone to lean on for help. Jacob was the one that I considered my best friend, at first. Then, he came down with mono or some other virus. He just stopped speaking to me after that. Knowing that everyone I knew and loved had abandoned me cracked the whole 'good girl' act.

I had been living by myself in an apartment for some time after Jacob's time away from me; Chief Waltren checked up on me every once and a while. I hated him with a passion after he considered me unfit to fend for myself; other people may have considered me mentally unstable but were just too polite to tell me so. The Chief found two horrible foster parents for me and I was put on practical house arrest for at least a week until my mental health improved. As soon as I was able to leave their house for hours at a time, I met Alex. And right after that, I became the bad girl. I had always thought about running away from this stupid town, but I didn't want it to land me somewhere even worse than the Bill and Jenn household.

My eyes started to tear up, remembering all of this. I considered it a knee-jerk reaction. Whenever I thought about Charlie, Renee, Phil, or Jenn and Bill delivering their first punches, my eyes automatically began to burn and water. I hated it.

Holding my breath, I slid out from underneath the sheets, trying my best not to wake Alex up. I reached for my jeans and underwear on the floor and quietly put them on.

As soon as I had buttoned them, I felt Alex's hands slide around my waist, pulling me back onto the bed against him. "Where do you think you're going?" he mumbled.

"I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute," I whispered.

He sat up and kicked the sheets off. "How about we go together?" he asked, moving to sit next to me on the bed, ignoring his pants on the floor beside his feet. He pulled me onto his bare lap and started kissing me again. His lips moved fast and hungrily along with mine. I froze when his hands slid down my shirtless back, reaching to unbutton my pants again.

I pulled away. "Not right now, Alex," I said calmly. "Maybe later."

He sighed and put his head against my chest. "Fine," he said, defeated. "I'll be waiting here, then."

I stood up, grabbing my shirt and throwing it on. As I left the room, I heard him straightening the sheets on the bed. I slipped into the bathroom and shut the door, clicking the lock on the knob. I slid down onto the tile floor, opening up the cabinet under the sink. As I shifted through Alex and Nick's belongings, I found what I was looking for. Their spare razor blades. I took a deep breath as I held the sharp edge above my left arm.

_"Bella." _I smiled and let out a huge gust of air I didn't know I had been holding. His voice, soft as velvet, was still one of the most calming things that could ever enter my ears. It became addictive. _"Don't do this again," _Edward's voice begged.

Ignoring his plea, I slid the edge along the largest vein in my arm. The stench of blood made me incredibly dizzy, and I rushed to find a washcloth to wipe the mess up. Along with the methodical throb of my newest cut, there was a dull roaring in the back of my head.

_"Why are you doing this?" _

Because I had to. I hadn't heard his voice in so long . . . it was making me crazy. I never heard him speak to me while on the motorcycle anymore. It was now sitting under a sheet of dust in Bill and Jenn's driveway. I had given up on it.

As his voice faded away, I just watched the blood cover the small washcloth. I tried putting pressure against it, but the bleeding continued. I must have cut the vein or something, but I wasn't panicking. I wouldn't really care if I bled to death, right here on my boyfriend's bathroom floor. Death would put me out of my misery. But, unfortunately, I was too much of a coward to kill myself directly; I couldn't just pick up a nearby gun and blow my brains out. I was suicidal indirectly. Slicing my arms, risking an unhealthy pregnancy or an STD, riding in the car with my drunken boyfriend . . . I didn't care if I was killed that way.

I looked down at my arm again. The bleeding was slowing down, and I felt somewhat disappointed that it had. I bit my lip, trying to keep my dinner in my stomach as I wiped up the remnants of my blood. I found a band-aid and strapped it onto my arm as tightly as I could. I hid the bloody washcloth behind some of the bathroom shelves. I would retrieve it later and dispose of the evidence.

I splashed my face with water and took a deep breath before showing myself again in Alex's bedroom. He was sitting on the top of his sheets, still ignoring his clothes on the floor. He was holding up a small white cylinder. "This is supposed to be the best stuff to smoke. Nick bought it for us to try. Want one?"

Perfect; this was exactly what I needed. I held my hand out for the loaded cigarette and greedily took out a lighter. I lit it up with one click of the lever and inhaled its fumes. Alex was right, this was amazing. I automatically felt it taking it's effect as soon as I had sucked it into my lungs.

The usual symptoms happened; my head grew light and dizzy, my lips went numb, there was a slight ringing in my ears, and I kept having the strangest urge to laugh when I wasn't really all that happy. I loved it.

"Isn't this stuff amazing?" Alex asked, slurring his words. I could tell he was already high, even after his first cigarette. He was made easily high almost as easily as he was able to get drunk.

I giggled, trying hard to hold back the strange laughter. "Yeah, it's great," I laughed.

Right after I blew out a large puff of smoke in Alex's face - causing us both to start laughing - I felt a burning sensation between my fingers. I looked down, frowning at the singed skin between my thumb and forefinger. My cigarette only had about an inch left, and the burning drugs had reached my finger tips. "Ow," I muttered, just watching the glowing end of the cigarette dim as my fingers swallowed it up.

Alex laughed. "Damn! I'm gonna need to buy more of this stuff."

I threw what little bit was remaining of my cigarette into the ashtray on the floor. Then, I plopped down onto the pillows. "Oh, wow," I said, giggling uncontrollably.

All of a sudden, Alex was on top of me, his cigarette gone. I didn't even remember him throwing it out, let alone moving to lay down on top of me. I laughed. "Can I help you, Al?" I asked, hardly even hearing my voice around the loud ringing in my head.

I didn't even hear one word of his response. Automatically, I started giggling when his lips began to slide across my neck, biting and kissing it. He kissed me all the way down to the hem of my shirt, taking it in between his teeth. He lifted it over my head with his mouth, a goofy smile on his face. My pants and underwear were off of me in seconds after my shirt. He took my articles of clothing and threw them all across the room, beginning to move his hands across every inch of my bare body.

Alex's lips were on mine, quick and rough. His tongue traced along my bottom lip, and I could taste the delicious drugs. I clutched him closer to me, grabbing his neck forcefully. He did the same, grabbing the small of my back and pulling me against him. I felt his lips turn up into a smile as he pulled the dark sheets over our heads.

**A/N: I'm already working on the next chapter. You will meet the evil foster parents in that one :) Review and tell me what you thought!**


	5. Bruised

**A/N: The evil foster parents are in this chappie! I hope you all like it!**

**Bella:**

Alex crawled off of me and fell down onto the bed, pulling the sheets back down so we could at least attempt to catch our breath. "That was amazing," he said, turning towards me. I didn't say anything. I just continued to lie there, not really moving. The silence wasn't uncomfortable. If anything, it was normal; just the sound of our heavy breathing and my heart beating in my ears was strangely comforting.

Alex broke the silence first. "Bella?" I froze, my breathing momentarily cutting off. He hardly ever called me Bella; that name only came out of his mouth when he was angry or when he was attempting to be romantic. Those instances in itself were very rare. Reluctantly, I rolled over on my side to face him. "I've been thinking . . ." he trailed off and I began to really wonder what he was about to say. His face was thoughtful; he was hardly ever this serious. Especially after good sex.

His finger was tracing up and down my thigh; definitely a sign that he was thinking hard about something. I began to panic and started grasping at straws with ideas to lighten the mood. "Wow, Al. Don't strain yourself," I joked.

He didn't laugh and his finger froze on the side of my hip. "I'm thinking on serious terms here, Bell." I bit my lip, wondering what on earth was going through his mind. And, rather abruptly, he blurted out a strange question. "What would you say to us running off together. To Vegas."

"What?" I said. "I'm not sure I understand."

"We should run off together to Vegas. And maybe find one of those simple chapels . . ."

I nearly fell off the side of the bed. "Alex Donovan, are you asking me to marry you?"

He ignored my referring to his last name. He hated it when I did that. "I mean . . . well . . . yeah, I am." He turned so that he was directly facing me. He propped his head up on his hand. "Think about it: you could live with me and ditch your foster parents. We've done everything that married couples do. Why not make our relationship official?" Alex looked away, and even in the dark, I could have sworn I saw his cheeks darkening in color. "And sex is a sign of love and passion, right? I love you, Bell. Will you marry me?"

My euphoria had worn off; I had only had smoked one cigarette and I had expected just as much to be sober soon. Because I was feeling somewhat back to normal, I didn't find this funny at all. "I . . . can't do that," I whispered.

Alex pulled away, offended. "Why?" His large green eyes seemed to glow in the dark, their deep gazes piercing me right through to the heart.

"Al, please, don't do this to me," I begged, moving towards him and placing a hand on his cheek. "I'm not ready for marriage anytime soon." I paused. "To be honest, I'm not sure I will ever be ready for marriage."

That had been the final straw. Alex pulled his face away from my palm and got up, retrieving his clothes and yanking them on. "I understand," he muttered under his breath.

"Please don't be upset with me," I whispered.

"I'm not." His voice was so curt and uncharacteristic for him, that I reared back as if I had been slapped. I felt my throat tighten, and a few tears escaped from the corners of my eyes. I quickly wiped them away and tried to sit up. I was a little sore; he had been rougher than usual. I sighed and stood up, slightly wincing in momentary pain. "I think you should take me home."

"Fine," he said. He picked my clothes up and handed them to me, not even looking at me. I bit my lip and tried not to breath as I held back my tears. Alex was my best friend, and I think I may have lost him. I couldn't stand the thought of being abandoned again. I put my clothes back on in silence. Alex had already walked out to his truck, leaving me completely alone in his room; I heard the car start.

As I walked out, I made sure that I had picked up my bloody washcloth. I pushed it deep into the pocket of my jeans and walked out into the humid air. Trying not to think of my upcoming doom with Bill and Jenn, I got into the truck. Alex still couldn't even look at me. I glanced at the time on the radio; it was a little past seven . . . and I was definitely screwed. Just the thought of what would soon happen made my stomach feel like it was icing over. Today was really not my day, and it had hardly started.

Alex drove off, not speaking, not turning on the music, not doing anything. His driving was mechanical; I couldn't help but glance over at him every once and a while. His jaw was clenched, his focus only on the road and nothing else.

When he pulled into my driveway, I decided I would try and do anything to make him forgive me in the limited time I had before Jenn noticed his car outside. I leaned over to kiss him on the cheek, and luckily, spraing my sanity, he didn't pull away. "I'm sorry," I said. "Feel free to come over later."

Alex's response was a stiff nod and nothing more. I sighed and hopped out of the car. He was gone as soon as I had shut the passenger door.

"Bella!" This was Bill. I turned to stare at him; he was undoubtedly wasted. His abnormally large, blue eyes seemed to pop out of his head when he was angry. His entire balding head had turned purple with rage. "What the hell have you been doing all night?!"

"I slept over at Alex's," I murmured as I tried to shove past him into the house. He wouldn't budge.

"Jenn and I are not going to raise a slut! Grow up! You need to learn to respect our rules, damn it!" His fist flew out and hit me square in the cheek. I was knocked down the two steps that led up to the house. My head cracked against the pavement, but I didn't even bother to cry out in pain. I needed to just stay silent. "You are to be home by 11:00 _every_ damn night, you hear me?! I don't know how we even got stuck with a whiny, mental kid like yourself," he said as he walked back into the house.

I groaned as I rubbed the back of my head. Blood was trickling down my neck from a deep gash on my scalp. I pulled out the bloody washcloth and held it against my newest injury. I winced in pain as I pulled myself up from the ground. I had scraped my elbow up, along with both of my hands. My cheek where Bill's fist had hit me was beginning to throb and ache.

As soon as I walked into the house, I ignored my foster parent's stares. I reached the kitchen and opened up the freezer, looking for some ice. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" Jenn slammed the freezer shut, narrowly missing one of my fingers to her extreme disappointment.

"I was looking for some ice," I croaked.

"For what?"

"My cheek," I whispered, wishing that she would just leave me alone for once.

"It looks fine. You don't need ice for that little, tiny scrape. Now get to your room before I give you something you need to ice," she threatened, poking me hard with her sharp, manicured fingernail in the space right above my collarbone. I moved towards my room, walking slowly because of the sudden dizziness that had overwhelmed me. It was either the stench of my blood or the head injury. But, before I could get to my room, I felt hands on my back. Jenn had pushed me forwards so hard that I had almost fallen over. "Quit sulking around and lock yourself up in that room. I don't even want to look at you right now." I ignored her and made my way into my microscopic room. But not before I heard Jenn mutter under her breath, "I hate myself for even offering you a home. I thought we were going to get a good and innocent kid. Not a slut." Even though that hadn't even been the case, I ignored her and spared my physical health by not arguing.

After I had locked the door behind me, I fell down on my bed, trying not to pay attention to the throbbing on my scalp and face. I sifted around my sheets, trying to find my syringe that I had last used while in an emergency like this. I needed the pain to go away.

My hand traced over a piece of the needle, and I let out a large breath of relief. This was my last full dose of heroin, and it may be my last if things between Alex and I didn't improve.

My breathing had gone erratic as I tried to hold back tears. I held the needle firmly and pushed it deep into my skin; even deeper than what was necessary. My thumb pushed down on the end of the syringe, releasing the dose. The cold liquid flowing through my veins was perfect and exactly what I had needed. The pain everywhere seemed to subside immediately.

I dropped the needle onto the ground, and fell back onto my pillows. My eyes closed and the drug pulsed through me with lightning fast speed.

Behind my lids, I saw _him_. His pale face was beautifully enraged. There was a dull roar in the back of my head, and I couldn't tell whether it belonged to him or if it was the drugs taking effect. I didn't care. When I focused on the perfect face, the euphoria was gone. Instead, I was pierced through with uncontrollable sadness. _Why did you have to leave? _I thought miserably just before drifting off.

**A/N: There's that one! Review please! I'd love to hear everyone's input!**


	6. Cheater

**A/N: And then next chapter! This one is going to have some pretty harsh language in it by the way . . .**

**Bella:**

My eyelids were still heavy as I sat up from my bed. Every inch of my body was in excruciating pain . . . there was no way that this could be the heroin talking. The after effects were never this bad. I winced as I stood up, straightening my posture. Pain shot through my spine, causing me to bite my lip to stop me from crying out. I glanced at my cell phone on my bedside table. I hardly ever used it; the only person who called me on it was Alex.

I picked it up and flipped it open. I quickly dialed Alex's number, hoping that he would answer my call. It rang and rang, but there was no answer. It went to voicemail and Alex's voice on the other end made me crazy. I hit the "End Call" button and redialed. No answer again.

I sat down on the edge of my bed, hardly feeling the sharp pains all along my body anymore, dialing and dialing. "Please answer me," I begged to no one. He never picked up.

Glancing at the clock on my phone after ten minutes of calling Alex, I reared back in shock. I had slept for a little over three hours. Bill and Jenn were probably rejoicing in their living room after having not heard me in three entire hours. If it kept them happy and able to leave me alone, then I would stay in my room for the rest of eternity. But I knew that was impossible for someone like me. Someone who hated free time.

Defeated, I shut the phone again and threw it on the bed. If he needed time, then I would give it to him. I vowed that if he didn't call before dinner, then I would try again.

But time passed, and I never heard from him. I even skipped dinner, hoping that he would call me back at some point. My phone never rang.

And the phone continued to stay silent for an entire week. I was so busy hoping that he would call or at least answer me that I hadn't even noticed the extra bruises and scrapes from Bill and Jenn. The beatings were only distant memories . . . and I didn't really care anymore.

I only came out of my room when the foster parents from hell were gone. I had grown incredibly weak after hardly eating. I only ate when I felt as though I was about to pass out, even when I wanted to. I swore to myself that I would hear Alex's voice before I starved to death on my bedroom floor. But there had been no contact between us. I would have called Nick, but one of his ex-girlfriends had stolen his phone after a painful break-up between the two of them.

Ugh, _break-up_.

Maybe this was some sort of 'figure-it-out-yourself' sort of situations. Alex wasn't talking to me and hadn't all week. Maybe this was just another way of saying, "It's over, Bella."

The after effect wouldn't be nearly as bad as my last experience. I was only abandoned; no phone calls and not even a warning. Just a birthday party gone incredibly wrong. And then after that . . . there was nothing. I guess I had been completely empty all along.

The thought of me being alone and abandoned _again_ was enough to drive me completely mad. I had smoked quite a few cigarettes while waiting for my phone to ring, but it didn't do much to calm my nerves. I had used up my last dose of heroin, but I had another drug stash in my floorboards.

As soon as I had remembered that secret stash, I automatically felt the need to use them. I didn't care that I was a drug addict. If they made me feel better for a short time, then I would do anything to take this pain away.

Bloodying up the ends of my fingers in the effort, I ripped the floorboard out of its place, grabbing the plastic bags full of Alex's 'gifts' to me. I picked out a drug that looked promising and poured the remnants into the small cylindrical piece of paper. I wrapped it all up; there was so much crammed into the tiny piece of paper that it barely stayed put. I quickly took out a lighter and lit the end of the makeshift cocaine cigarette. As soon as it was resting against my lips, I breathed in deeply, inhaling the fumes.

I smoked one cigarette, then two, then three . . . after that I had completely lost count. I could barely even remember combining the different drugs and herbs together, hoping for the strong effects that followed. The smoke coming off of the end of the drugs smelled amazing, completely calming me. Although I didn't feel stressed or upset at the moment, I knew that I couldn't just keep sitting here. I needed to get to Alex and sort this whole thing out before it was beyond repair. Edward had gone, Charlie, Renee, Phil, Jacob . . . I couldn't take it if another person abandoned me.

I wouldn't even live through it.

When I opened my window and climbed out into the rain, I just barely noticed that I had no cigarette in my hand. Choosing not to go back and get another, I walked over to my motorcycle and hopped on, turning the keys in the ignition. I couldn't even hear the roar of its engine through the rain and the thunder. That in itself may come in handy for getting away from Bill and Jenn.

I drove off, feeling dizzy as the road didn't want to stay still. I swerved and braked as I tried to keep in control of the bike. I think I may have gone through more than one red light on my way to his apartment. I couldn't even tell. The world seemed like it was spinning extra fast.

When I pulled into the parking lot, I fell off of the bike into a muddy puddle. I took deep breaths, trying to keep control of my spinning head. As I stood up, the feeling wasn't euphoric at all. It was painful. My heart was beating in my chest at 100 miles per hour and I broke into a sweat, despite the cold rain hitting me in the face. My head hurt and I couldn't even remember where I was for a moment.

I made my way over to Alex's apartment door. I knocked, and the harsh sound of my knuckles against the wood made my head pound. I lost my balance and fell to the floor, gasping as my heart sped up. I held onto the floor mat as if my life depended on it.

A muffled noise sounded somewhere in the parking lot. I looked over, trying to see what was going on. Nick's car had pulled up next to my bike. A door slammed and I winced at the noise. Before I knew it, Nick was standing over me. His figure was a rippling image; I couldn't even concentrate. "Holy shit, Bella, what happened to you?" I felt his hands against my back and under my legs, lifting me up.

"Put me down," I groaned, hoping that I wouldn't get sick on him. "Alex. I need to see Alex."

He set me down on the couch. When did he open the front door? "What did you take, Bella? I need to know. You're scaring me," he said. His voice kept fading in and out; it was only making me more furious.

Ignoring his protests, I stood up and wobbled over to Alex's room. I shoved the door open. I wished more than anything that this sight was only a hallucination.

Alex was in bed with the local bartender, Elizabeth. Her clothes were across the room, and Alex was on top of her, his clothes gone as well. "What the hell is going on here?" I slurred, feeling myself sway. I had to hold onto the edge of the door frame. This is not happening.

The both of them nearly fell off of the bed. Alex pulled away from Elizabeth and came towards me. "Bella! It's . . . It's not what you think!"

"It sure as hell is what I think, you pathetic asshole! How _dare_ you!?" I screamed on the top of my lungs, nearly falling over with the effort.

I didn't even see Nick storm forwards. He shoved Alex right in the chest, nearly knocking him over. "What the hell, Alex!? I knew you were low, but not low enough to cheat on her. Get the hell out of my apartment, _now, _before I kick your sorry ass."

I ignored Nick's scoldings to his brother. "Were you glad to be rid of me so you could freely cheat on me with this _slut_!?" The door frame I was holding on to seemed as if it was shaking under my weight. I hadn't even realized that I was rapidly trembling. "You _lied_ to me! Everything you said a week ago was a lie!"

The rough carpet came in contact with my right cheek. There was a dull, achy pain against my face; I closed my eyes, continuing to gasp as my heart sped up to an even faster rate. A roaring sound was echoing in the back of my head. I knew it was Edward's. At one point, I could swear that he was saying something to me. But none of it made sense; I couldn't understand any of it.

My eyes opened when the floor disappeared from beneath me; I couldn't even object. I didn't even know who it was that was holding me. There were voices talking, yelling, but I couldn't really concentrate enough to make out what they were saying. The ringing in my ears had grown severe and I couldn't feel my legs. My heart was racing, my head was throbbing, I couldn't even move anymore.

"Bella, can you hear me? Bella?" There was a cold hand on my clammy forehead. "Shit, she's burning up. I think she overdosed. Alex, call an ambulance." I couldn't even hear his reply; everything had gone completely black.

**A/N: I am working on the next chapter now . . . and there may be a little surprise POV . . . (:**


	7. Visitor

**A/N: As I had promised in the previous chapter . . . a special POV!! Unfortunately, it is not Edward's but I will get to that later in about two chapters after this one! I know some of you need your daily doses of Edward and I assure you that he will be coming up soon!! But, for now, bear with me! I hope you like it!**

**Alice POV:**

_Bella was being hauled off in an ambulance, a boy with dark, curly hair near her. Three EMTs were rushing to get Bella oxygen and different IVs. She was so thin . . . her cheeks had sunken in. She looked as if she had lost at least ten pounds since I had last seen her, and she didn't have ten pounds to spare to begin with. Her face had turned a dangerous color; pure white and her lips were tinted blue. Was she dead? _

I gasped and clutched the armrest of the couch. Jasper's hand was on my shoulder. "Alice? What do you see?" I didn't answer him as I concentrated on what the EMTs were saying to each other.

_"What happened when she passed out?" someone asked the dark haired boy. Bella was hardly visible under all of the people trying to help her._

_"I don't know," he answered. I could tell from his quavering voice that he was worried sick. Had Bella found someone else? "When she came to my house, she was a wreck. She kept gasping, and the next thing I knew, she couldn't even stand up anymore. She was shaking all over when she passed out."_

_"Did she say anything to you about how she was physically feeling? Did she complain about a symptom?"_

_The boy shook his head. "No, I don't think she could. Her teeth were chattering; she was completely out of it."_

_The EMT he was speaking to nodded, his face grim. "Definitely an overdose."_

"Oh, God. Bella," I choked. This wasn't possible. There was no way this was Bella; it couldn't be. I knew her, and she would never, _ever_ resort to drugs. Was she trying to kill herself? It wasn't supposed to happen this way. Not this early. She was only 19 years old . . .

Did she even know what this would do to Edward? I froze as soon as his name entered my mind.

Edward.

Leaping up from the couch, I began frantically searching for a cell phone, throwing couch cushions this way and that. I searched in the pockets of my jeans and jacket. Unsuccessful, I hurried into the bedroom. "Jasper," I called out to him "I need your cell phone. I need to call Edward."

He moved to stand in front of me, preventing me from ransacking the house even further. He put both of his hands on my shoulders and I felt immediate calm. "Alice, what is going on?"

"It's Bella. She's overdosed on drugs. I think she was trying to kill herself." The words sounded so ridiculous. "I have to call Edward _now_," I said, the words coming out all at once. I watched again, the same scene with Bella and the dark haired boy in the speeding ambulance. But I didn't see any sign of whether she would live or die - her future was up in the air, no sign of what would happen next. There wasn't anything besides chaos as the EMTs ran around.

Jasper sighed. "Are you sure you are seeing all of this correctly?" He eyed me skeptically. "Are you even sure that you saw Bella instead of someone who just looked like her?"

"I know what I saw, Jasper," I snapped. He remained calm as I panicked. "The problem is that I can't see anything else. What if she dies?" I cringed internally at the thought. Bella couldn't die. I couldn't even imagine what it would do to Edward . . . he wouldn't dare live through it. "I have to tell Edward. He needs to go back."

I moved away from Jasper, finally spotting the cell phone on the desk on the far end of the room. He stopped me again. "Wait, Alice. How do you think Edward would react if he found out Bella tried to do this to herself? We couldn't even find it in us to tell him about what happened to Charlie and Renee. We knew he would hate himself for not being there for her. How do you think he would feel if she committed suicide?"

"What happened with Charlie and Renee was different. I hoped he would find out on his own and go back because he _wants_ to. We were wrong to keep that from him; he is going to find all of this out and some point. But even then, Bella's life was never on the line. He _has_ to go back now." I sighed. "I'll lie about what happened with Bella. You're right; he can't know the reason why she is nearly . . ." I broke off, not wanting to even say the word.

_Dead._

Jasper let me go as I grabbed the cell phone and quickly dialed Edward's number. It rang and rang, but there was no answer. I should have known that he wouldn't have picked up. I hadn't spoken to him in months. And then last conversation we had, he was not at all in the mood for talking - it was the day of Bella's birthday. I hadn't called back since.

Frustrated, I dialed again, hoping that he would answer me just this once. But hoping he would just wasn't enough.

"Damn it." I shut the phone and concentrated, waiting to see the image of my brother. Edward was inside of what looked like an abandoned warehouse. He wasn't doing anything; he was just sitting there, his back up against a concrete wall. His face was so expressionless and dead . . . I could hardly stand it.

The vision faded. I turned to Jasper. "I can't just sit here and wait to see what happens. By then it may be too late." I put the phone in my jacket pocket. "Please call Carlisle and tell him where I'm going. And also tell Esme not to worry." I kissed him on the cheek. "I'll be back as soon as I can. When I get there I will call you."

As soon as I was out of the door, I was already making arrangements for Red-Eye Flights. I dialed every number possible for the fastest airlines in Europe and finally reached one. I got into Jasper's car, the Audi, and hit the gas hard. The tires squealed out of the garage and I sped down the road, nearly crashing into a few cars in my frantic hurry.

I caught the plane just before it took flight, thankful that it looked fast enough to get me halfway across the world in a reasonable time. During the ride, I kept a close watch on Bella's condition. From what I could tell, she had overdosed on more than one drug. Cocaine had been one of them, but the doctors had not yet discovered what else she had taken. Her condition was extremely unstable for a while, but she seemed to be barely holding on.

The plane rocked violently as we landed, jolting me from my concentration. I opened my eyes to the Forks Airport, keeping an eye on Bella. She was still alive.

Remaining unseen, I jumped into the nearest car that looked fast enough to suit me. It was a convertible with the top down; and lucky enough, the keys were hidden in the glove compartment. The comforting, soft rumble of the engine kept me calm as I made my way over to the hospital, which was only a couple minutes away if I avoided any late night traffic and ignored any unreasonably slow speed limits.

I parked the car in the closest spot to the emergency room door. I jumped out, not taking the keys out of the ignition. The automatic doors slid open as I walked into the dim-lit lobby. The receptionist looked up at me, her expression full of envy and curiousness. "How can I help you?" she asked.

"I'm looking for Isabella Swan."

She glanced at her computer and typed in a few things with a quick hand. "She's in room 201. Down that hallway and to your left in the Intesive Care section." She jabbed a finger behind her. "I'm not sure they will let you in yet. I believe her condition was only just reported stable."

I nodded. "I won't be long." I hoped that I wouldn't ruin anything Edward had planned by showing up and having her realize that I was there in the first place. If she was going to make it - which I still couldn't exactly tell through my visions - then I would stay until she was perfectly fine. If she wasn't going to live through this, then I was going to have to intervene; I was going to have to get to Edward somehow.

As I hurried into her room, I tried to think positive. But it was hard to think that way when you were able to see the future, able to see what negative things could or would happen next.

I felt a sudden wave of relief as I noticed Bella's room was now empty of nurses and doctors. It was only her, asleep in the small, white bed and the steady beeping of her heart monitor. I glanced at the clock on the wall; it had taken me only three hours to get here, and I was glad to see that time had done her some good.

I stepped closer, and the sight was even worse than in my vision. She really was deathly pale and her skin was stretched tightly over her even more prominent cheek bones. The deep purple circles under her eyes bothered me. She looked horrible . . . like she hadn't slept in years. It was the outcome of the drug use, most likely, I realized with extreme dismay. Even though I could never see Bella using any sort of drug, I suddenly believed that she had definitely been exposed to them as I received a thorough look at her.

I bit my lip and sat down in the chair beside her bed. I pulled out the cell phone, quickly dialing Jasper's number. He answered after the first ring. "Alice?"

"Yes, I've just gotten here," I said, answering the question I knew he was going to ask.

"How is she?"

I hesitated. "I don't know, but I think I should stay a while so I can be sure." I sighed. "From what I can tell, I don't think she will be waking up any time soon. Have you heard from Edward?"

Jasper made a sound of disapproval. "No. Carlisle wasn't happy with Edward for not answering the phone. He wants to go and get him, but I stopped him before he and Esme left. Carlisle said that those who overdose as severely as Bella did don't usually live through it. Things like this can take turns for the worst; and most of the time there is nothing any doctor can do." I felt an uneasy lurch in my stomach as I looked over at Bella again. She was covered in different IV tubes and cords leading to monitors. Her condition looked relatively grim, but she had been lucky so many times before . . . "It's now or never," Jasper added, his voice concerned.

I sighed. "I'll try calling him again. Let Carlisle know that I will keep him posted on what's going on. If Bella isn't better soon, tell him to find Edward and get him back here as soon as possible." Unfortunately, Bella's future wasn't clear at all. I couldn't see anything promising enough for me to voice.

"All right. I will," Jasper replied. "Call us tomorrow morning for another update, please."

I nodded even though I know he couldn't see me. "I love you."

"I love you, too." I hung up the phone.

I began dialing Edward's phone number, leaving messages saying that it was urgent, but not letting on about any specific details. He never answered me. I watched him in visions; unmoving and still completely lifeless. He hadn't moved from his position from when I last saw him. He was still in the abandoned warehouse, his back up against the wall. I could tell that he hadn't been hunting. His eyes were black as pitch and he had very deep purple circles under his eyes. He looked so tired.

If only he knew what was going on. . .

I redialed his phone number again.

**A/N: Yeah, I know. It's a long chapter, but hopefully this explains some things. The next chapter will be a a mixture of an Alice POV and a Bella POV. You'll understand why very soon. The next one after that will be another Bella POV which leads to her disappearing. And then, after that, EDWARD'S POV!!!!! So review and let me know what you thought of this uneventful chapter :D**


	8. Scream

**A/N: As I promised, a mixture between Alice and Bella's story :) Enjoy!**

**Alice:**

Doctors began to come into Bella's room regularly. They didn't really seem to notice me; I never said anything to alert them to my presence. There was nothing to ask or say.

I had gone outside about a week ago to check in with Jasper, just as I had done every single day since I had gotten here. I let him know that there had been no miraculous improvement in Bella's condition, which was to be expected. Carlisle had wanted to come and check on the situation himself, but I convinced him to stay in Europe with Esme and Jasper while they were at Oxford. Rosalie and Emmett had come back from Africa and now knew everything that had happened while they were on one of their honeymoons. Rosalie wasn't happy with me.

I knew very well that no one really approved of my interfering like this. But they also knew me too well to stop me; I couldn't just sit there and do nothing. They all knew better than to try and talk me out of this.

After concluding the conversation with Carlisle and Jasper that day, I had walked back into the lobby to see the dark-haired boy that had appeared in my visions - I heard him introduce himself as Nick Donovan. He seemed to be having a heated discussion with one of Bella's doctors.

"I'm sorry, son. We've done everything we can, but I can't guarantee anything," the doctor told him.

"I still don't understand. She's survived most of this, right?"

"For the most part, but my only concern is her body may be to weak to fight. We've given her medications that should keep her heart rate under control, but if she doesn't die because of the overdose, she may die because of the side effects. Whether it's a heart attack or a stroke, I can't do much else to help her."

That had been the last official update I had received. I stayed clear of the boy named Nick; Bella didn't need to know that I had been here. From what I could tell from my visions, the odds were in Bella's favor. But, as Carlisle had said, things could very well could take a quick turn for the worst without any warning. I stayed a little while longer so I could be positive.

As time went on, less doctors began to monitor Bella. I had seen her waking up many times to her friend. I knew immediately that all of this was my cue to go. Before I left, I said a quick goodbye to Bella. I put my hand on her cheek, feeling thankful that her skin was back to a normal temperature. There was some color back in her cheeks and the circles under her eyes had faded slightly. She looked so much better.

I hated to leave, although I would never tell that to anyone besides Jasper. I had truly missed Forks, and I had missed Bella even more, but I couldn't interfere with what Edward had planned. None of us could find it in us to do that.

When I walked outside into the rain, I pulled my phone out and dialed Jasper's number. "Hello?"

"Jasper, I'm on my way home," I said. It felt strange to be saying this, especially aloud. Forks was just like many of our other living places - rainy, sunless, cold. But I wasn't heading home; I was leaving it.

**Bella:**

"Bella?" I tried to open my eyes, but they didn't seem to want to cooperate with me. My throat was very dry, and I heard myself choking as I tried to swallow. There was an irritating noise to my right, like a cell phone going off inside of my brain. I heard my name again; someone with a high-pitched voice was speaking to me from somewhere above my head. On my right cheek, something cold and hard, like marble was resting against it.

When the loud beeping noise became quieter, I heard my name again. I forced my eyes to open, and standing there was one of the most beautiful faces I had seen in quite a long time. Her eyes were black instead of the usual topaz, and the dark circles beneath her eyes were more pronounced and seemed permanently etched into her pale, white skin. She let out a relieved sigh and rolled her eyes. "You scared me, Bella."

"I'm sorry," I said around a wimpy smile. "What are you doing here?"

"You're my friend." Alice's face looked confused. "I didn't want you to wake up here alone."

I nodded, my eyelids still heavy with fatigue. It dawned on me that I didn't even know where I was or how I got here. Everything in this room was completely white; the chairs, the walls, the sheets that were lying on top of me. I was in a hospital. "What happened?" I asked.

Alice crossed her arms over her chest, her black eyes disapproving. "You overdosed on cocaine. You nearly died, you know? If Alex hadn't called the ambulance when he did, I don't know what would have happened to you. You were lucky that you lived through all of that."

I stared at her disappointed face, completely confused. "How do you know Alex?"

"What are you talking about, Bella? He's my brother." The icy hand against my cheek seemed to grow warmer. "Maybe you should get some more rest." I looked up again, and the person standing over me was definitely not Alice. The black eyes turned green, the inky black hair faded into brown, growing out into a curly disarray, the dark purple circles smoothed out into a creamy colored ivory. It was Nick.

Momentarily shocked, I couldn't even say anything. The feeling that came over me was as if a rug was yanked out from beneath me. It was hardcore disappointment. "No, I don't want to go back to sleep. I'm sorry; I was hallucinating."

Nick didn't look convinced. He sighed at sat down in a chair beside my bed. "How are you feeling?" This was what I liked most about Nick. He was the perfect big brother when he needed to be.

"I'm not exactly sure. I'll let you know when my brain starts cooperating," I said, my voice rough. "What day is it?"

"Thursday. And you've been here since three Fridays ago," he said, his voice unhappy.

"You mean I've been out for three weeks?" My voice shot up a few octaves in surprised.

"Well you can't combine cocaine, meth, and powdered amytal and live to tell the tale, Bella. Did you even know what drugs you were taking together? If you hadn't already killed yourself from the overdose, then the doctors swore to me that you would die from a heart attack or a stroke." He sighed and tried to lower his voice. "But, like I said earlier, you are _extremely_ lucky. About one out of a hundred survive from this sort of drug exposure." Nick paused. "Could you just answer me one thing? Were you _trying_ to kill yourself?"

I didn't really know, to be honest. Maybe I was, and then again, maybe I wasn't. It may have been a subconscious act of suicide, but there was no way to be sure of that. I sighed and answered Nick. "Why would you think that I was trying to commit suicide?"

He wrapped his hand around my wrist, holding my arm up. He pointed at the pink scars etched onto my skin. "Call me crazy, but I still think this is a pretty good clue."

My cheeks turned hot. "How long have you known?"

Nick let out a dark laugh. "I may not be the smartest person in the world, Bella, but I'm not blind." He sighed and awkwardly put his arm around me. "I know you probably aren't in the mood, but I think you should know that rehab is always an option."

"No, no, I'm definitely in the mood. I don't need rehab; I can break the drug habit myself." A rehabilitation center would drive me insane. There would be nothing to do except say, "My name is Isabella Swan and I am a complete and utter drug addict," over and over again. The people there seem like they want to rub the addictions in your face until you have no interest in anything anymore. It would completely drain me.

"Please consider it, then," Nick said. "You almost _died_, Bella. And it won't only be for drugs, it could help you with depression."

I glared at him. "What the hell makes you think I'm depressed? I've had a few upsets, so what? That doesn't mean I'm depressed." He threw me a skeptical look. "Well your good-for-nothing brother cheated on me after proposing to me!" The lump in my throat was visible through my voice. "You can't expect me to be ecstatic after something like that." After being unconscious for so long, the memories were hitting me hard. Just the vision of Alex and that disgusting girl in between the same sheets where I had been just a week before pulsed anger through me.

Unfortunately, I knew I had it figured out. He knew how independent I was; he knew that I was against marriage. My rejection was inevitable and he knew that damn well. I had even told him I didn't want to be tied to someone like that . . . they could always leave you. And then what would happen?

I wanted more than anything to just scream. I wanted to yell at Alex, Nick, that horrible bartender, Elizabeth . . . I wanted to yell at _him_.

"I'm very sorry about that . . . he answered to me, I promise you," Nick said, interrupting my infuriating reverie. "But I bet not all of this is Alex's fault. You've been this way ever since I've met you. If anything, it's getting worse. I know you weren't always like this. The moment I saw you walk into the bar, I knew that it wasn't your place." He leaned towards me; his eyes flashed angrily. "So what happened to you before you walked into One-Eyed Pete's, Bella?"

My eyes had started to water; I held my breath, hoping that would stop the tears from brimming over the rims of my eyes. I hadn't exactly told them what really happened to my parents. They knew I didn't have any living relatives, but they had no idea why. I had never let on about the previous heartbreak . . . if you could even call it that much. I had lost the truest of true loves, and no one would know about it.

My whole life had been lost; I had nothing.

I shook my head, remembering that there was someone else in the room with me. "I don't want to talk about it, Nick," I snapped, my voice quavering.

He sighed and leaned back into the chair. "Obviously, it's a sensitive subject," he muttered, mostly to himself. "But, Bella, you are going to have to talk about it eventually. You're never going to get better if you let what ever happened just eat at you like this. I don't care if you tell me or not, but you have to tell someone."

"No, I don't. I don't have to talk about it if I don't want to. That's my decision; now mind your own damn business." I crossed my arms, tangling them in the IV cords. Pretending not to notice, I turned my face away from Nick like a four-year-old.

_"Consider it, Bella." His_ voice was in my head, soft and velvet, like melting honey; there was a painful jolt in my chest. Automatically, I hugged my torso, attempting to hold myself together. _"Please. For me."_

I sighed, feeling like I was going completely insane in the silence. _Have it your way, _I thought.

Nick seemed to sense my resignation when I turned towards him again. There was a mischievous smile spreading across his face. "So, how soon did you want to try rehab?"

**A/N: The good stuff is coming up! I promise!! Review and tell me what you thought :)**


	9. Monster

**A/N: Hello again! This is the end of Bella's story!! For right now anyways . . . this chapter leads to her disappearance, but it may not be entirely clear to where she is. I have to savour some of the mystery for Edward's POV!!**

**Bella:**

Breaking this habit had not been nearly as easy as I thought it would be.

There was no such thing as just cutting the drug use off cold turkey and moving on with life. Anyone who thinks it's that easy is entirely wrong. I had dealt with counselors who said nothing but "how do you feel about that" over and over again. That just triggered my rage and irritation which made me seem like I was completely mental and insane. Afterwards, I'm sure the counselors understood exactly how I_ felt about that_.

The withdrawals were the worst part of these past few weeks. I spent most of my time standing over a toilet, shaking and sleep deprived. Nick was usually there to help hold my hair up and carry me to my bedroom so I could just lie there in utter misery, but some of the doctors said that I couldn't always rely on him for something like this. They insisted that resisting drug use had to be an action done purely by me and no one else. The situation became even worse when they sent him away whenever he came to see me.

It's not like I could help the fact that my brain had become dependent on drugs. Why should I have to deal with something like this alone?

My bags were packed. Today was my last day being stuck in that prison. I had been completely clean for nearly a month and a half, and strangely enough, I never once said the words, "My name is Isabella Swan and I am a drug addict". Rehab wasn't at all like they pictured it in movies and books. It was far worse.

There were no visitors past 6:00 in the evening and the patients were all sent to their bedrooms at 8:00. Normally, I would have snuck out during the nights - I couldn't sleep anyway - but night guards patrolled the hallways. Hence the prison reference . . . but strangely enough, rehab didn't have any metal bars in the bedroom doorways.

I hadn't made any friends with my fellow addicts; I kept to myself and refused to be grouped in with the other patients. No one could ever relate to my reason of resorting to drugs. I'm absolutely positive that none of these people had their vampire true love leave them because they were nearly attacked by said true love's brother.

"Here you go," said one of the secretaries in the lobby. She handed me a piece of paper with an awful lot of small print that I refused to read. "It basically states that you are free to come back if you are in need of further treatment. Just sign here, here, and put your initials here." I signed everything with my clumsy scrawl and practically hurled the paper at her, eager to get out of here. The lady didn't seem offended; I must not have been the only leaving patient to react this way.

I walked out of the building with my small, beat-up suitcase. I hadn't been outside in so long, and the smell and feel of the humid air was strangely calming to me. The calm feeling disappeared when I saw Chief Waltren leaning against his police cruiser.

I had hated him with a passion since he had taken over my father's job. And then, after that, he had dared to call me "mentally unstable" and "incapable of living on my own" to my face which landed me in foster care with Bill and Jenn, the worst parents in the universe.

My eyes automatically narrowed at the sight of the Chief. He looked so much at ease, like he was so incredibly happy with this horrible world. He smiled at me and the regular surge of hate shot straight up my spine. My ears and cheeks began to feel hot; this was one of the very few times my face grew red because of something other than embarrassment.

"Good to see you, Bella," Cheif Waltren said, walking towards me. "You're definitely looking better." So I looked horrible before?

He cleared his throat and lifted his hand to his hair as an uncomfortable gesture. I'm sure he knew he had offended me. "Your doctor called me with the good news of your release and I figured I would go ahead and give you a ride home."

"It's not that far of a walk." It was now that I realized how lifeless my voice really sounded.

The Chief looked puzzled for a moment. "I can't just let you go wandering off on your own." He opened the passenger side door and took my suitcase from me, stuffing it in the trunk. Reluctantly, I hopped into the car, not in the mood for a further argument, and he got into the driver's side.

"I would appreciate it if you would just drop me off in Port Angeles. It's a shorter drive anyways," I said, a bitter edge in my tone.

Cheif Waltren hesitated. "I'm not sure I feel comfortable doing that . . ."

"I don't really care," I muttered under my breath, just low enough that he didn't understand me.

He threw me a confused look and shrugged. "I guess you would want to see your friends by now." If that's why he thought I wanted to be in Port Angeles, then that's fine. But in truth, I really just needed a drink. I didn't dare think of the second-hand smoke at the bar; I didn't need another withdrawal symptom to be triggered just by a simple thought.

The Chief drove me right up to the edge of the local shopping center. I hopped out without another word to him; no thank yous or anything that would make him think that I repsected him at all. I took the suitcase out of the trunk and walked off, not even looking to see if he was watching me. Honestly, I could care less.

I walked all the way over to One-Eyed Pete's, but froze in the doorway. Luckily, no one saw me as I moved out of view. Elizabeth and Alex were sitting together at the bar - something about the way Alex was speaking to someone nearby led me to believe that things were about to get ugly. He was drunk, of course, which caused him to mouth off at people that normally he would have left alone. In this case, he was speaking to a very large man in a black, leather jacket with a heavy looking motorcycle helmet under his arm.

Before hearing any more of the confrontation, I left. There were sounds of bottles smashing against the floor and loud screams as my back was turned. I didn't go back to make sure everything was okay, I didn't really care if something happened to Alex. He meant nothing to me.

I continued down the sidewalk, passing various buildings. I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going; all I could concentrate on was just getting away from everyone. I wanted to be away from Bill and Jenn, from the Chief who thought he was succeeding in replacing my father, from the smoke and the alcohol at the bar, from anything that was even remotely possible to get away from.

When my legs began to ache from walking so far, I stopped at the first alleyway I passed. It seemed promising enough. This part of town was completely deserted; there was nothing here besides shops that had gone out of business and abandoned warehouses. To my knowledge, very few gangs or biker groups travelled around down here. There was nothing of interest in this strip of empty buildings. This place was empty.

Just like me.

I pulled my suitcase into the dark alley and sat down, leaning up against the brick wall. I had no idea what the hell I was doing . . . Bill and Jenn probably thought that I was dead by now; there was no point in going back and disappointing them.

"Stay out!" a man's voice boomed from quite a ways down the street. I couldn't hear much; the voices didn't make any sense from that far.

I shrunk down, crossing my arms over my stomach. I hoped more than anything that I remained unseen here . . . though I doubted the man who was thrown out would come this way.

However, my doubt was incorrect. Someone was approaching with angry footsteps and an unintelligible mumble. I recognized the muffled and infuriated voice, but I wished more than anything that I was wrong. And, as the footsteps grew closer and the voice of the person became clearer, someone in my head was screaming for me to get up and run away. I squeezed my eyes shut and hoped that I wasn't seen by Alex. I knew it was him as his voice seemed to grow louder and louder in my ears.

I got up and ran to the end of the alley . . . but it was a dead end with nothing but a dark green trash can. I clawed at the plastic top, trying to pull it off, but it was too late. I could see Alex at the other end of the alley, grumbling under his breath. He hadn't seen me yet, but I was frozen in terror as he picked up my suitcase and threw it at the wall. My clothes scattered all across the street when it hit the bricks.

_"Stay very still." _His voice had entered in my head, and I knew that this situation could not end well. I did as he told me and didn't move an inch.

"God damnit!" Alex yelled as he brought his fist against the wall. "That good-for-nothing . . ." he trailed off as he looked up, his eyes staring directly at me. "Who's there?" I hadn't even realized that I was shaking. I felt a scream build up in my throat, but forced it to stay down. "Well, hello, Bella. Long time, no see."

I didn't say anything as he stumbled towards me. He fell against me, knocking me up against the wall, his face centimeters from mine. I could smell the alcohol on him as he breathed heavily in his rage. "Get off of me, Alex," I ordered, trying to sound fearless.

He ignored me. "I'm sort of put out with you, Bella," he said, his words blending together. "Nick kicked me out of his house and I've been living on the streets because you had to barge into my room that one night." I hadn't even seen his fist fly out in the darkness of the alley, but I definitely felt it. His knuckles collided right against the side of my head, leaving me dizzy and disoriented. I fell to my knees, clutching my throbbing forehead. An enraged roar echoed in the back of my head.

Alex leaned forward. "Did you hear me, Bella? I've been living on the god damn streets! And it's _your_ fault!" His fist came into contact with my face again. "You owe me big time!"

_"Bella, get up!"_ Edward's voice was screaming in my head, loud and as clear as ever. _"Please, get up! Run!"_ I had refused to ever let his name break through the barriers I had thrown it behind, but now, all I could think about was his name, his face, his enraged voice as he tried to get me to run.

I had been so confused and lost from the blows to my head. It didn't even register to me what he was doing when he had unbuttoned my jeans. My pants and my underwear had slid down my ankles in a frighteningly quick amount of time that I realized I must have momentarily blacked out. Alex shoved me down onto the ground, so that I was lying flat on my back. And then, he was on top of me, his bottom half bare as well.

"No," I mumbled. "Stop, please." My head pounded and I couldn't seem to keep my eyes open. The only thing keeping me awake was the horrible pain in my abdomen. My nails scratched against his back as I tried to get him off. "Please, stop," I begged again.

This time he had listened to me . . . but I knew the damage had already been done. He pulled his jeans back on and ran off as if nothing had happened.

My eyes opened - I hadn't even realized that I had lost any consciousness. I wasn't really all there anymore; my head hurt and my eyelids were heavy. Something thick was trickling down my face, and I recognized it as blood from a burning pain just below my hairline from one of his punches. I knew that I shouldn't just lie here and wait for someone to find me like this. I didn't want to see or speak to anyone.

I didn't even want to live anymore.

This was all my fault for letting things get this bad. This situation was all my fault . . . I couldn't live knowing that it was.

I winced in pain as I pulled myself off of the ground. Tears had started to fall down my cheeks without my permission. A rippling sob erupted from my chest, but I tried to keep the noise to a minimum. I was so disgusted with myself . . . no one needed to hear it. It was my problem; my fault and my burden to live with.

I stood up and had to bend and hold onto my knees for support. On the ground, I noticed a small puddle of blood from the gash on my forehead. I looked away from it, trying hard to imagine it as paint instead. I pulled my jacket off and let the fabric soak up the blood. The trash can that I had failed to open earlier had been knocked over at some point. It's top had fallen off; I stuffed my soiled jacket in it, almost positive that no one would find it there. I secured the lid to the edge of the can and turned away from it, never to think of it again.

My jeans were back on, my head was still connected to my neck, depsite the hard punches that had been delivered. I was extremely dizzy and wasn't sure whether it was a good idea to be walking around. But, although I really wanted to, I couldn't just lie there.

Wincing again as I took the small steps towards the mouth of the alley, I looked down the road. The lights of One-Eyed Pete's had gone down and I suddenly wondered how long I had been unconscious for. They closed at two every morning, but I couldn't remember what time I had left the rehabilitation center. I couldn't remember much of anything besides what had just happened with Alex.

The tears flowed harder down my face as I dared to even think of it.

I walked down the street slowly, trying my best to ignore the discomfort. I didn't really care that I was walking in the opposite direction of One-Eyed Pete's and away from Bill and Jenn's house. If anything, I wanted to cross the ocean to another continent and to never, ever be seen here again.

I reached the end of the street where my only option was to turn right, but all that was there were more abandoned shops and warehouses. But there was something else. A strange feeling of unease washed over me. I wondered if it was just the horrific aftermath of the attack in the alley, but I knew that this had to be something different . . .

"What the hell are you doing here?" a deep voice asked from behind me. I whipped around to see a very angry looking woman who was in her mid-20's at the least. She towered over me, and her black hair was tied in a bundle right at the nape of her neck.

I didn't answer her; instead, I followed the path towards more empty buildings. But there was a tug on the back of my shirt. I was pulled back towards the lady. "You're Bella Swan? The old Chief's scrawny little daughter, aren't you?"

_"Don't answer that," _Edward's voice warned.

"What's it to you?" I croaked, my throat raw and stinging.

"Excuse me? You have no clue who you're talking to." A group of four men stepped out into view. "I'm Maya Forrester. Nathan Forrester's wife." She seemed to find pleasure in my facial expression as I realized who she was speaking of. "That's right. My husband and my brother-in-law are in jail because of your father. Now that he's dead, the only way I can get my revenge is through the only other living relative." A horrible smile spread across Maya's face.

**A/N: I know...EXTREMELY depressing...POOR BELLA!!! But I tried to capture her bitter look on everything since rehab and hopefully I did it well enough! Review and tell me what you thought!**


	10. Be Safe

**A/N: Hey guys! I know it has been so long since I have updated any of my stories . . . I'm so sorry about that! I've had a crazy few months and on top of that just found out that I am pregnant! So I've been extremely busy and have been trying to get thing as settled as possible :)**

**I really hope you all enjoy Edward's point of view of this chapter and I am once again extremely sorry!**

**Edward:**

The newspaper article began to crackle and rip as my fist clenched tightly around it. My throat filled with a fiery burning sensation, not in thirst, but in enraging remorse. Leaving Bella in the first place was horrific enough to have had dealt with. But this . . . this was far worse. I thought I was protecting her by leaving . . . but obviously that just wasn't the case here. Now, she's gone.

_Missing._

I glared down at the headlines in front of me, wishing more than anything that this could be just some cruel and heartless trick and Bella would appear in the doorway, a smile on her face and blush on her cheeks. But I knew that was impossible. The only one here was the new Chief of Police who was trying his hardest to hide his guilt-stricken expression. His mouth opened multiple times, and his mind was frantically searching for something that he could possibly say to me for consolance. Honestly, I couldn't really think of anything to say myself.

Mark cleared his throat, glancing down at the floor in apparent discomfort. "I'm not exactly sure how else I can explain all of this."

"Just tell me everything you know," I pleaded, my voice sounding strange in my ears, almost strangled.

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh . . . well before Charlie's death, he came to me and mentioned that Bella was going through a bit of a hard time. He had a lot of people just keeping an eye out for her just in case; he was so worried about her. And I mean I could see why he was worried . . . he didn't really mention to me what the circumstances were, but your family's name did come up at one point. She was a mess when I first saw her."

A "mess". That was how my Bella was being described to me. Unfortunately, I caught a glimpse of her in his mind as he was remembering; my breath caught in my throat at the sight. Her eyes were no longer warm brown, they were just completely lifeless. Her pale skin seemed to have been permanently blanched of any color that was there before. Those high cheek bones had grown more prominent under her eyes due to the drastic weight loss she seemed to be dealing with.

I stopped paying attention to his mental picture. It was far too much to handle at this point . . . I couldn't take anymore of it.

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen . . . she was supposed to find someone else. She would be happier, safer.

"After Charlie died, I kept watch over Bella until her mother and stepfather arrived to pick her up. She wouldn't ever talk to me, no matter how hard I tried to interact with her. But when she got the news about the plane crash, nothing really seemed to matter to her anymore." He seemed extremely uncomfortable discussing all of this with some stranger he just now met on the street. "She stopped eating all together. I had a psychologist come by and see her, but she wouldn't interact with him either . . . I had no choice but to put her in foster care. After that she went pretty far downhill . . ."

"Where was she living?" I quickly asked, jumping up to my feet. "Who were the foster parents?"

"I'm not legally allowed to give you that information, son . . ."

There was a deep growl building up in my chest. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath, attempting to control my already flaring anger. "I don't really care about legalities in this situation, Mr. Waltren," I snapped. A few metal bars and officers couldn't keep me from getting to Bella. I would do anything that was possible to find her.

He stared blankly at me, which only seemed to make me grow even more furious. I could almost feel the nervousness emanating from him. He looked down, resigning. "She was living in the care of William and Jennifer Florence. I can't give you anymore information than that. And you didn't get any of this from me."

I gathered up the newspaper headlines and flipped through them, just in case there was some sort of clue to where she had disappeared. I didn't expect them to reveal anything, so I wasn't surprised to find that the given useful information was scarce.

As I folded them up, I started towards the front door, preparing to look for her myself since the police were doing such a wonderful job. But just as I touched the door knob, there was a hand on the sleeve of my jacket. I whipped around, glaring furiously at this waste of a police officer.

"We are doing all that we can to find her - "

"This is what you call 'doing all you can'?" I interrupted. I gestured to the empty space in front of me. "I don't see Bella anywhere around here. She's still missing, is she not?" I let go of the door knob and stood directly in front of Chief Waltren, my fists clenched at my sides. "If sitting around is all the effort you can possibly put into finding her, then I'm deeply sorry I interrupted your night."

I turned to leave again, trying more than anything to keep myself from snapping this worthless man's neck right on the spot. My patience disappeared completely as he spoke once more. "Wait," he said. "There's something else." He held out a small, folded piece of paper and handed it to me, quickly stepping away. "I went through Bella's room after she disappeared. This was under a loose floorboard."

The paper looked ridiculously old; it was fragile between my fingers as I opened it. My jaw dropped, completely shocked at what it read. "Be safe."

**A/N: I will definitely be updating soon! I am going to update the rest of my stories as well so keep an eye out for them too! Review :)**


	11. Ring

**A/N: Hello everyone! Sorry it's taken me forever to update . . . but I'm finally back in action! I've been going through and updating every story that I haven't finished so I can start on some of my newer ideas. Hope you enjoy!**

**Bella POV:**

The hardword floor was freezing cold against my already bruised cheek. My entire body was shivering, but I couldn't be sure whether it was the dropping temperature or the fear that was pulsing rapidly through my veins.

I had passed out. But regaining consciousness seemed worse than the initial blackout. My stomach was turning, making my mouth water. I hadn't eaten in two days; of course what else was to be expected?

My skin was covered in dark, dried blood. I couldn't necessarily remember how I got here . . . but I did know that the trip was very unpleasant. And obviously bloody.

"Get up." Maya was back, and in even a worse mood than the last time I saw her. A punch to the face was the result of earlier . . . what could possibly be next? As much as I hated to admit it, I wished more than anything it was death.

I pushed myself upright using my scraped up palms, wincing with the effort. Maya glared down at me in disgust. "I don't want the filth of the likes of you dirtying up the floor."

I glared back at her, noticing the gun in her left hand. _Kill me_, I thought. _Please just kill me_.

Just then, Maya's eyes bulged out of her sockets. "You got blood on the wall." Her voice was dangerously low and angry. I knew what was coming before it hit me. Literally.

She raised her right hand and flung it across the back of my head. The sound of the metal hitting my scalp echoed nastily in my ears before the ringing started. My vision blurred around the edges and I grew dizzy, smelling and feeling the blood trickling down the back of my neck.

I took a deep shaky breath, feeling nauseated. "Why keep me here if you're not going to just kill me on the spot?" I snapped, throwing as much venom into my voice as possible.

Maya laughed darkly and crouched down, eye to eye with me. She put the barrel of the gun against my forehead and cocked it back. "Keep testing me and I will." I could hear her pointer finger tightening against the trigger. "Even though I would just love to be rid of you, I can't get anything out of it if I killed you right now."

And with that, she jerked the gun away and stood up. She began to walk away, but before she reached the door of the deserted room, she looked over her shoulder. "Don't try to run away again. Unless you want your stay here to be even more painful than last time." She smirked. "But once that moronic officer that replaced your father finds you here and bargains with me to have my family released, it will all be over with. I promise."

The door slammed behind her, releasing a painful sound into my already ringing ears. I heard the lock click. I squeezed my eyes shut and pressed my cheek back to the icy floor.

I was being held for ransom. She wanted her husband and her brother-in-law out of jail. And I wanted to die. Maybe it would end up being a win-win situation.

The sunlight through the small window across the room was slowly disappearing. I thought of it as a symbol of hope when I had first been thrown in this place. Now that the light was dwindling away, my hope was doing the same. There was none left. Everyone important in my life is gone.

I had no reason to be here.

Using almost all of my remaining strength, I stood up, my knees buckling as I grew more and more disoriented. I put my hand against the wall and took a deep breath, steadying myself.

Slowly, I made my way towards the window, moving my feet very carefully. It almost felt as if I was on a treadmill. No matter how much effort I put into it, that window never got any closer. The ringing in my ears grew louder.

Without warning, a hand gripped a fistful of my hair, yanking me backwards. "Trying to escape again?" It was one of Maya's disciples, who's name I had conveniently forgotten. He gripped harder, bending my head back so that my neck was completely exposed. Something cold and sharp touched the space behind my ear. I froze.

"You're quite the stubborn one, aren't you?" His voice was mocking.

"Bella, don't move." I let out a harsh breath that I hadn't realized I was holding. It was his voice. I thought I'd never hear it again. It was music to my ears. And I wished more than anything that it would be the last thing I would ever hear.

The knife against my neck dug slightly into my skin, just enough to draw blood. "Haven't you figured out by now that you aren't allowed to leave until the police figure out where you are?"

"Don't say anything. Just do as he tells you." His voice was tortured, worried. A tone I knew was made up in my head. He didn't care about me.

No one did.

The man with the knife laughed. "At this rate, I guess they'll never put the pieces together. Oh well, if they take too long I guess we will just kill you."

He let go of my hair and shoved me back into the wall, my head smacking against the cement. My vision darkened, and then everything turned black. The ringing in my ears grew louder than ever. Almost loud enough to cover up the sound of a gunshot.

_Please, just let me die._

__**A/N: Sorry it was so short! But I'm working on the next chapter already :) Review please!**


	12. Prey

**A/N: Enjoy! It's reaching it's final chapters :( I'm thinking MAYBE three left :( Oh well.**

**Edward POV:**

My teeth were clenched together about as hard as possible, and my hands were shaking so hard as if they were on vibrate. As I got into the driver's side of my Volvo, I felt as if I were about to explode from the wave of emotions that had washed over me.

How could I have let this happen?

Alice. I needed to talk to Alice. Remembering that I no longer had a cell phone, I sped off in search of a payphone. My hands seems to tremble even harder from the stress and anxiety.

I continued to drive until I reached the diner across the street on the edge of Port Angeles. And to my relief, there it was. A black payphone.

Nearly leaping out of my still running car, I shoved in two quarters and dialed Alice's number. It only rang once.

"Edward." Her voice was heartbroken. She knew.

"Where is she, Alice?" I asked, frantic. "I need answers, please tell me all you know."

"I . . . I don't know where she is. It's some sort of abandoned house, but I'm not necessarily sure where that's located." There was a moment of silence. "Edward, we are all going to meet up with you. Stay at that diner, okay? Don't go anywhere."

I hung up. From the tone of Alice's voice, I could tell that there were some things that were being left out. For the first time in decades, I felt almost nauseated. I shouldn't have gone so long without a cell phone. I didn't think there would ever be a reason where I should need one. I thought it would be easier . . . but turns out I was making things worse. So much worse.

_Bella, please be alright_, I begged to whatever God would listen to me.

Not even five minutes later, a Mercedes and a red BMW came speeding around the corner. The members of my family came piling out onto the sidewalk. Esme leaped towards me and threw her arms around my neck. I could tell there would be tears in her eyes if she were able to produce them.

"Edward, we've missed you so much," she said, her voice shaking. "I'm so sorry . . . we will find her soon. I'm sure of it."

Alice stepped closer to me, looking me deep in the eye. "I've left out quite a lot, Edward." And then, she allowed her mind to replay every vision possible. The first was Bella in the hospital. Her face pale, her cheeks shallow . . . if I hadn't known any better I would have thought she was dead.

There was a soft pang dead center of my chest, where my heart should be beating if I were alive. Was it possible for an unbeating heart to break?

The next was my Bella in what looked like a rehabilitation facility. Her demeanor was no longer happy, her face wasn't as vibrant. It was lifeless and miserable.

_Bella, why?_

The third was the worst so far. So awful that I couldn't even bear to let it register in my mind. Bella was in a deserted alley with no one around. There was a blonde haired man, obviously intoxicated, hovering over her as she screamed.

If I felt nauseated earlier, that was nothing compared to how I felt now. I didn't even realize how tightly my fists were clenched at my sides. A growl erupted from my chest.

_I'll kill him_, I thought._ If it's the last thing I do, I'll kill him._

And then, Alice replayed her latest vision. Bella was broken and bleeding on the floor in what looked like an abandoned house. Somewhere on her head was a deep gash that was causing blood to trail down her neck and shoulder. Her palms were scraped and also bleeding. And there was a gun to her forehead, held by a burly looking woman. And then it faded to black.

My breath caught in my throat. "Alice . . . is she still . . ."

"She's alive, Edward." I sighed, so relieved. "But we don't have time to waste. Because she won't be." She then closed her eyes, searching for any minor detail in her past visions. "She was next to One-Eyed Pete's, the bar in Port Angeles. We'll start there."

We all got there in less than five minutes. The sun had completely gone down, and I could hear loud and slurring voices from the bar. It was the usual nightlife of Port Angeles. Someone had to know where Bella was before she was taken. They just had to.

I walked inside with only Alice and Carlisle following. I watched the rest of my family as they passed the doors and turned into the alley. As I looked around, I didn't see any familiar faces at first. But then I saw a man with the same unkempt blonde hair that had been in Alice's vision.

I got closer to him. "Sorry to bother you, but do you know of an Isabella Swan?"

The man turned around and I found it very hard to contain myself.

_Edward, it's him, _Alice thought. My teeth clenched as I saw his face, the same one that had been hovering over Bella as she screamed for help.

"Who's asking?" he snapped, smelling of nothing but hard liquor.

"May I speak to you outside for a moment?" My voice came out between my teeth, sounding more like a snarl than a question.

"Fuck off."

Without thinking, I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and slammed him up against the far wall, listening to the satisfying crack his skull made against it. The whole bar grew silent as I growled low. _I'll kill you._

"What in the hell is wrong with you!" he screamed. I tightened my hold around the collar of his shirt and threw him into the wall again.

_Edward, don't. Too many people around. _As much as I hated to admit it, Alice was right. It took every ounce of my will to stop from snapping his neck right where he stood. He deserved to die. A painful and unmerciful death.

But I gave in and turned around, grabbing the man by the back of the neck. I dragged him out into the alley and threw him into the bricks. "Where is she?" I hadn't even realized how deadly my voice sounded until I saw the fear in this disgusting vermin's eyes.

"Who cares?" he snapped. "She was a slut. No one will miss her."

I sighed through my clenched teeth. "If you tell me I won't kill you," I whispered. "Although, no one will miss you either."

"I don't know where she is."

"Oh really? From what I gather, you were the last one to see her after what you did to her." His eyes widened. "That's right. I know. And I'm prepared to take care of you myself if you don't tell me where she is."

He gulped, his thoughts consisting of nothing but frightened rambling. "Look, I don't know what happened to her . . ."

My fist came down against the wall just inches from his face, leaving a gaping hole in the bricks. I snarled, hardly able to control my anger.

"Edward, stop." Carlisle came up behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. "He's telling the truth." Taking deep breaths to steady myself, I loosened the grip I had against his neck. "Besides, he's not worth it. Why give him the pleasure of death when he can rot in jail instead for what he's done?"

"Don't think you're off the hook," I hissed, glaring at the man. And then, I let him go and he dropped to the floor, practically breathless. He took off down the street, nearly falling over multiple times during his escape.

"Edward." I whipped around. Alice's eyes were wide as she gripped Jasper's arm. "I know where she is. We have to go. Now."

Seeing the vision that was replaying in Alice's head, I took off in the direction of the street name. It was in a deserted area of Port Angeles. One that obviously had an abnormally high amount of gang activity due to the graffiti art that was becoming more and more noticeable. A bloodcurdling scream rang through my ears, along with the thunderous sound of a gun shot.

And then the smell of Bella's blood hit me.

**A/N: Sorry for the cliffy :) Review!**


	13. Done

**A/N: I'm pretty much done with the story . . . I wrote the next couple chapters already so I will be updating this one pretty quick from now on :) Enjoy!**

**Bella POV:**

A horrific pain erupted into my right shoulder. My vision was still very blurry, but the ringing had died away. All I could hear was a blood curdling scream. It took me a minute to realize that the screaming was coming from me.

_They shot me._

The smell of so much blood became nearly too nauseating to bear. I was almost sure I was going to be sick from the bile that was rising in my throat, causing my screaming to now sound more strangled than anything. My shoulder was pounding, and I could tell that bones had been shattered from the speed of the bullet. "Please, just kill me," I cried. "Please."

"And why should we give you what you want?" Maya snapped. I could feel her breath on me as she leaned down, the gun to my head again. "Those idiots are going to give me my family back in exchange for your pathetic life." A bitter laugh slipped between her teeth. "You know, I may just wait until they're released and just kill you anyway. It's what you want, isn't it?"

I clenched my teeth and gripped my aching shoulder. It took everything in me to keep from bursting into hopeless tears. I couldn't take this anymore.

Maya grabbed her cell phone, growing angrier with the situation by the minute. I heard her press the keypad three times. Why was she calling 911?

It rang once before a dispatcher answered. Maya almost yelled the address of this abandoned house so quickly that I could hardly comprehend it. "Get the police here now!" she screamed. "And if they aren't here in five minutes, Isabella Swan dies." She then shoved the phone in my face. "Beg for their help, Bella."

I shook my head, mainly because I couldn't even find the words to speak. My vision cleared fast enough to see Maya nod at the man that had held the knife at my neck. So fast that I couldn't even realize what he was doing, he flung around a gun he was holding behind his back and pointed it at my leg, pulling the trigger. I screamed as the bullet penetrated my calf. I felt the bones crack and break as I continued to scream.

Maya smiled and said something else to the police that I couldn't necessarily hear. She snapped the phone shut and began pacing around. She was growing more furious and impatient.

I fell forward, gripping my leg with my good arm. Tears formed dark drops on the denim of my jeans. There was no point in me hoping. I knew I was going to die here anyway. I didn't bother listening for the police sirens . . . plus there weren't any to be listening to yet. I couldn't do this anymore.

"Don't worry, Bella," Maya said, her voice mocking. "It will all be over soon."

I closed my eyes and tilted my head back against the wall, wincing at the pain that seemed to be spreading every space possible on my body. I was done. I was going to die here.

"Bella, please." It was his voice again. It felt as if I had been shot in the chest as soon as his voice entered my ears. But it was just my entire being breaking apart. "Please, don't give up."

_I don't have a choice, _I thought hopelessly. I knew he couldn't even hear me. It was just another hallucination.

"Yes, you do. Don't give up. Please. For me." The normally velvet texture of his voice was now tortured. He was pleading for me to stay alive.

There was a hand on my neck, knocking my head forward so I was looking directly into the eyes of my future killer. "Do you hear any sirens? Because I sure as hell don't." She smiled. "I told you your life was pathetic. No one cares about you here. You have no one. Not your precious father, your insolent mother, not even a boyfriend to come and save you."

"Bella, fight back!" I closed my eyes, savoring my last few minutes listening to his voice. I was losing my energy.

_Edward, I love you._

"No, Bella, please!" he begged. "Fight back!"

I heard Maya cock the gun back, preparing to fire. She pointed it straight at my aching heart. "Are you ready?" An awful grin spread across her face. "One, two . . ."

As if someone had taken over my body, I leaped forward, knocking the gun out of Maya's hand. It slid all the way to the other side of the room while Maya screamed in protest. My leg was protesting very painfully, but I ignored it and ran forward towards the window. Her accomplice reached for me, but I used every ounce of remaining strength to throw my leg upward, hitting him in the worst place possible. He doubled over and toppled to the floor, yelling out a stream of profanities.

My leg and shoulder were in agony once I reached the window. I shook it, trying to get it open. Even though it was two stories high, I was ready to jump and run for my life. "Come on, open!" I yelled. It rattled on it's hinges, but remained shut.

"Bella!" Edward yelled in my head.

I whipped around, feeling the pain as soon as I had heard the loud sound. A bullet hit me square in the chest, knocking me backwards. The panes of the window broke as I fell through the glass, feeling it slice my face and arms. It was almost as if I were falling in slow motion, but I hit the grass with tremendous force, knocking the breath out of me.

I had really hoped that dying wouldn't be this painful.

Glass shards had managed to lodge they're way into my already lacerated skin. And on top of that, I could feel the hole in my chest bleeding at an alarming rate, soaking my shirt. But for once, the smell of it wasn't bothering me anymore.

"Bella, no!" It was Edward again, but his voice was as clear as it had ever been. I smiled, despite the agonzing pain in my chest. Breathing was becoming a hard labor as I struggled to keep the oxygen flowing. But I was so tired.

I was imagining Edward kneeling down beside me, and remembering the feeling of his icy touch. For a moment, I thought I could actually feel a freezing hand on my forehead. I tried to reach up and touch my beautiful angel's face, but I had no energy left.

_I love you._

My body grew numb, and I realized I was no longer breathing.

I closed my eyes, and gave up.

**A/N: Sorry for the cliffy :) Review!**


	14. Pressure

**A/N: Kind of a depressing chapter I will admit . . . but I hope it's okay!**

**Bella POV:**

I wasn't entirely sure what was happening.

A part of me was sure that I was dead, but the other part said something else. More than anything, I felt as if I were floating into a pitch black oblivion. My ears were popping, as if I was stuck in very deep water with the pressure crushing me. My entire body was numb, which oddly enough was more uncomfortable than pain, knowing that you couldn't move anything.

"Bella, please, no . . ." It was Edward's voice again, so close to my right ear. His voice seemed to have the echo effect, but it was still just as beautiful. "Stay with me, please. Open your eyes, Bella." A dull ache in my chest was the only thing I could now feel on my body as I listened to the anguish in his tone. I wanted to tell him that I would be all right, that he could now live in a world without having to feel guilty about hurting me. He could move on with his more important distractions.

"Edward, she's dying. You have to change her before the police get here." That melodic voice had to be Carlisle's.

"No!" Edward yelled. I couldn't be alive. It wasn't possible for me to be hearing their voices like this, so real and so close.

"You have to do it." Carlisle's voice was remaining calm, just like it would have if he were actually here. "It's the only way. You won't live without her."

"Bella," Edward sobbed. "Please, wake up. You can't do this. I love you." As soon as those three words entered my ears, it all came flooding back to me. It was shocking how much damage a small bullet could do. And Alice would have seen this coming, knowing I would die from this. I knew her well enough to realize that she wouldn't allow her brother to feel guilty about anything, even if it had to do with me . . .

_They were really here._

"Carlisle, please try to help her. Please."

"I can't, Edward, she's losing blood too quickly and I can hear the police sirens. You have to change her now. She only has very few minutes left." I had in no way expected that being on the edge of death would be this unpleasant. I couldn't bear hearing their voices in so much pain, especially Edward's, over the death of a simple human. It was tearing me apart.

"I can't!" Edward cried. I wanted more than anything to let out a scream. I needed to wake up. Edward had to know I was all right. I'd give anything to just be able to open my eyes and see him one more time, to tell him that it was going to be fine.

"If you don't, I will," Carlisle said.

The dull ache I had been feeling in my chest turned into complete agony. I couldn't move, or do anything for that matter. _Edward, _I tried to say, but I couldn't find my lips.

"I don't know if I will be able to stop myself . . ." Edward managed to choke out between heartbroken sobs.

_Please make the pain stop, Edward. Please, _I begged. My chest was throbbing painfully, or maybe it was my heartbeat that was growing more and more torturous. Every throb seemed to grow more and more painful. But thankfully, the agonizing beating began to slow.

"Make it fast, Edward."

The beating in my chest slowed down to a minimal pace. It was then that I knew I was about to die. I could feel it. "Bella! Please, no!" Edward cried. His voice was beginning to fade away, causing me to panic in this odd purgatory.

I tried to kick, scream, do anything that would let him know that I could hear him and that I was sorry. I just needed to see him one last time.

_Please wake up! _I told myself.

"We're losing her!" Carlisle let his feelings of panic break through.

_Edward!_

Every sound was growing less and less audible. The stabbing pain in my chest had finally ceased, which was a good enough clue that I was slipping away. I realized then that it was no use.

_Edward, I love you._

"I am so sorry, Bella."

**A/N: Review!**


	15. Incentive

**A/N: I just felt like I needed to write this part in Edward's POV too...I didn't want him to feel neglected XD**

**Edward POV:**

Another gunshot erupted into the air, followed by more screaming. _Bella's_ screaming. I was so close to her.

"Edward! Hurry!" Alice screamed behind me.

The vision that Alice was seeing was replaying in my head, giving me the incentive to run as fast as I ever had in my 100 years. The wind whipped my face as I sped down the road, cutting through alleys. I didn't care if someone saw at this point, I needed to get to Bella.

The smell of Bella's blood was more potent than ever. My throat burned in protest, for I hadn't hunted in so long. I focused on finding her alive and well, rather than the thirst. I finally reached an abandoned neighborhood, seeing the street name that had appeared in Alice's vision. So close.

"Bella!" I yelled, hoping that she could hear me.

But following my voice came the most dreadful sound and by far the most dreadful sight. A gunshot, a small shriek, and then the shattering of glass.

My throat was burning so badly, but the sight of the girl I loved the most in this condition cut off my air supply. "Bella, no!" I dropped down on my knees beside her, horrified. She had been shot in three different places, and I didn't need Carlisle to tell me that one of them was undoubtedly fatal. Blood seemed to be pouring out of her wounds at a shocking speed. Cuts and lacerations covered her once clear, ivory skin. My chest ached, for this was the worst condition I had ever seen her in. I could hardly bear it. I had never felt more helpless in my entire life.

I felt a small shred of hope as Bella looked directly at me, but she obviously wasn't coherent enough to realize what exactly was happening. I knew she didn't really realize that I was hear next to her again. A weak smile crossed her perfect lips as her eyes began to close. I put my hand on her forehead, wishing more than anything that I were able to cry.

In a matter of seconds, her lids drooped down, completely covering her brown eyes. "Bella, please, no . . ." I begged, tearless sobs erupting from my chest. Her breathing was slowing by the second; I could barely hear her heartbeat. "Stay with me, please. Open your eyes, Bella." They remained closed.

Carlisle dropped down beside me. I hadn't realized my family had even gotten here quite yet. Alice, Esme, and Rosalie stood there, their hands clasped over their mouths. Their minds were flooded with horrified exclamations. But Emmett and Jasper were nowhere to be found. I could hear screaming inside of the house, but the only thing that I could remotely focus on successfully was my Bella.

"Edward, she's dying. You have to change her before the police get here." He scrambled through his bag, pulling out various types of medical equipment. Those were the worst few words that I would ever hear.

"No!" I yelled.

"You have to do it." Carlisle remained calm as he hurried to put pressure on the blood pouring from her chest. "It's the only way. You won't live without her."

"Bella," I sobbed. "Please, wake up. You can't do this. I love you." It was hopeless. She couldn't hear me. "Carlisle, please try to help her. Please."

He was trying as hard as possible to staunch the bleeding. But from the looks of it, there wasn't anything he could do. I didn't want to believe it. "I can't, Edward, she's losing blood too quickly and I can hear the police sirens. You have to change her now. She only has very few minutes left."

I squeezed my eyes shut, still sobbing. My Bella was going to die. "I can't!"

"If you don't, I will," Carlisle said, his voice quick.

"I don't know if I will be able to stop myself . . ." I said, my voice sounding strangled. It had been so long since I had hunted. The thirst was hardly controllable enough as it was. I couldn't bear it if I was the one to kill her.

"Make it fast, Edward."

Just then, I heard Bella's heart begin to sputter, and slow down to the point where it sounded as if it were skipping beats. She was dying quickly. "Bella! Please, no!" My chest ached in anguish as I could hear the life slipping away from her.

"We're losing her!" Carlisle said, the panic now clear on his face.

"Edward, change her!" Alice screamed.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. "I'm so sorry, Bella." I leaned down, taking her arm in my hands. I held it up to my mouth and bit down, feeling her blood trickle down my throat, quenching my thirst. Not to mention the _taste_ of it . . .

And then, the most beautiful sound in the world that I believed I would never hear again echoed through my head. It was Bella's voice, as sweet as it could be, giving me the will and ability to fight back against instinct.

I jerked back, releasing Bella's arm back onto the grass. I cut off my air supply and gripped my knees as hard as I could, trying my best to distract myself from the pain of my burning throat. I clenched my teeth as I listened closely.

Bella's heart had stopped.

**A/N: Review!**


	16. Never

**A/N: I'm currently watching Twilight haha :) But this is the last chapter! I hope everyone enjoyed it!**

**Bella POV:**

"Any minute now," a quiet, melodic voice said from somewhere behind my head. Was that Alice?

I heard a long sigh that sounded more tortured than relieved. "I can't believe this . . ." another voice said, closer than Alice's. Edward had to be within inches of me, his perfect voice was so clear.

"I'll give you two a minute," Alice said, her quiet footsteps slowly disappearing.

I felt strange . . . as if I had been in a great deal of pain that had suddenly ceased. It was exhausting, but at the same time relieving. I'd give anything to just sleep now, but something told me in the back of my head that sleeping wasn't an option anymore.

Struggling to compose my foggy mind, I attempted to open my eyes. It took quite a bit of effort, but I managed just fine. The first thing I saw was Edward, his face buried in his hands in pure anguish.

I reached up and touched his face. "Edward," I whispered. My voice was raw, my throat was on fire.

His head jolted upright, allowing me to look directly into those mesmerizing topaz eyes. I hadn't seen them in so long . . . I felt immediately healed.

"Bella," Edward breathed. He took my hand, his expression a mixture of torture and relief. "I am so sorry . . . I should have been there. None of this would have ever happened if I hadn't left. I am so, so sorry." He closed his eyes as he kissed the top of my hand. "I was almost too late . . . I don't know what I would have done if . . ."

"Please, don't," I said. I couldn't bear to see him like this, so upset and guilty. "I'm still here."

"I know." Edward breathed deeply. "However, wish that the circumstances were different."

"So I'm one of you?" There was a slight excitement in my tone that I could tell Edward found disapproving.

"Yes. I didn't have any other choice," he said, strained. "If I had waited any longer you would have been dead."

I swallowed, trying to extinguish the fiery burn against the walls of my throat. Instead, the burning increased. My hands reached up to clutch my throat, knowing that wouldn't do anything. The only thing that would help was something that made my stomach turn. Blood.

Edward noticed immediately. "You're thirsty," he sighed. "We should probably . . ."

"No, no, wait." I grabbed his arm before he stood up. "That can wait."

His posture relaxed as he leaned closer to me. I stared at him, taking in his perfect features that seemed like nothing more than memories for so long. My mind was so jumbled and I could feel nothing but hopeless confusion. I couldn't make sense of him really being here, so desperately worried. "What happened to -"

"Jail. All of them. Emmett and Jasper held them captive before the police got there to make sure they didn't run off. Not to mention it was a good distraction so Carlisle could get you away from the scene." Edward seemed to notice what I was going to ask next just by my expression. "Yes, the other man is in jail, too."

Alex was gone, behind bars. Someone I didn't need to worry about seeing ever again. The look on Edward's face gave it all away. "You know about that?"

Edward's face grew grim, but there was a spark of anger in his eyes. "Alice saw it and I found him. It took everything in me not to snap his neck where he stood . . ." He took a second to compose himself. "I can't think of anything to go through that's worse than that . . . I should have been there."

I spoke before thinking. "You could leave me again. That's worse than anything in the world."

He didn't respond to that. He simply bowed his head back into his hands, causing me to feel ashamed of myself for causing him even more guilt and pain.

"Why did you save me?" I finally asked, breaking the silence.

"Because I love you." Edward was looking straight into my eyes again. His eyes flashed in a peculiar way, as if he were disgusted with himself. "I can't live in a world where you don't exist."

Confused, I sat up on the bed that I had been lying on. I found myself speaking through clenched teeth. "But you said-"

"I lied," he interrupted. "I thought for sure I would be the death of you, Bella. I had to give you the chance of having a normal, human life. A life without me in it."

I stopped breathing. "What?" I whispered.

"You believed everything I said so easily. It killed me to lie to you and hurt you so badly. That wasn't what I wanted." He shook his head, guilt-ridden. "It was excruciating."

"But . . . _why_?" My voice was shaking, along with my entire body. I was almost as infuriated as I was shocked. The pains and hardships of this past year and a half had all been for nothing . . . absolutely nothing. It was all because of a lie.

"I couldn't bear knowing the reason that you were in danger was because of me, Bella. Every time I was even remotely close to you, your life was always on the line." Edward took a deep breath, like a human would when they were trying to keep themselves from crying. "But obviously that wasn't the case this time. I only made things worse."

"It never made sense for you to love me . . ."

"I always have loved you; that's never changed."

If my heart was still beating, it would have doubled in pace. "You love me . . ." I repeated, my voice drained of life. I felt so stupid.

"Very much." He reached forward and cupped my face in his palm. "After all of this, I'll never leave you again. I promise."

I didn't reply, for I was still in a considerable amount of shock. I had to be dreaming . . . there was no way this was all happening.

Edward took my silence offensively. His face was pained. "Unless, you want me to leave. And in that case I will go, if that's what you would want," he said, his voice uneven, strangled.

"No, don't," I begged, reaching out for him. "Please don't leave me."

He leaned towards me, his expression showing that he was thinking hard about something. "Alice tried to keep a lot of things from me . . . but they crossed her mind pretty often over the past couple of days . . . why did you do all of this to yourself?"

My guard shot up. "What do you mean?

"You know exactly what I mean, Bella," he said, his voice cross.

I sighed, defeated. It's shocking that I still hadn't learned my lesson not to argue with someone as persistent as him. "I don't really know . . . after I lost Charlie and my mom, I knew I didn't really have a reason to live. After you left, the only reason I wanted to live was for my parents' sake, not mine. I had no one to live for . . . so eventually I just stopped trying."

Edward sighed. "I guess I can sort of understand that."

My eyes widened. "R-Really? You're not upset?"

He snorted and rolled his eyes. "I'm not upset, I'm furious. But I can still understand."

I ducked my head down, ashamed of the behaviors I had resorted to out of weakness. "There's something else . . . and this may make me sound a little crazy." He stared at me, waiting. I took a deep breath before speaking again. "Whenever I was about to do something reckless or just ridiculously stupid, I always heard your voice in my head. It was completely clear as if you were standing right next to me, trying to keep me safe. That's the main reason I kept doing things that would potentially hurt me. I was always scared that one day, I wouldn't be able to remember your face or the sound of your voice. I didn't want to let go . . . but I think that's maybe because I knew that you loved me all along. I guess I never really believed that you truly didn't want me."

Edward was silent for quite a few minutes. Of course, I was completely speechless. I wasn't sure if I should say anymore.

Finally, he spoke up. "I can't read your mind, so I guess that I will never, ever understand how it works. I can safely say you are one of the most stubborn and confusing people that I have ever met in my entire 100 years." He paused. "But I am so madly in love with you anyway."

My favorite crooked smile spread across his beautiful face. He leaned in, and hesitated as if I were about to object to him kissing me. My hands lifted up and clasped behind his neck as our lips met. We both knew we no longer had to be careful anymore, which deepened the kiss. My fingers twisted in his unkempt hair as his lips grew harder on mine. The taste of him was ten times more dizzying after such a long time without it. My entire body filled with happiness, knowing I actually had his marble body this close to mine again.

To my dismay, he pulled away, a mischievous smile on his face. However, there was a small hint of sadness in his eyes as I discovered what he was thinking. I could no longer blush, for there was no blood pulsing through my veins. My heart couldn't skip beats when he as little as touched me. I was no longer hopelessly fragile, and he didn't need to fight to save my life for any reason whatsoever.

But as for me, I could care less. He was here, and would be here forever.

"As much as I enjoyed that," Edward breathed, his golden eyes smoldering. "I'm sure my family would love to see you with your eyes open."

"I never thought this would happen again," I sighed, my voice sounding completely dazed.

Edward smiled. "Never say never." He leaned in and kissed me again, just as passionately.

**A/N: I may do an epilogue, but I don't know yet. Hope that it was decent! Review and let me know how I did!**


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